


Everything has Changed

by qweezy0w0



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Brotherly Affection, Depression, Dream Needs A Hug, Gen, Hallucinations, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmare's Hug to be Precise, Past Child Abuse, Please don't read this in case you might get triggered, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Soft Nightmare, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, The twins need a hug, This is the darkest fic I've ever wrote, Trust Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:15:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 19,322
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22957786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/qweezy0w0/pseuds/qweezy0w0
Summary: Please read the tags before reading.Dream and Nightmare have been separated for years. Centuries even. It's almost impossible for someone to stay the same. But Dream always looks the same. Always helping people. Always smiling. Always happy. At least that was what Nightmare saw.But after he knew the truth, Nightmare just realized...how little did he know about his brother all this time. He should have known that no one ever stayed the same.
Relationships: Nightmare & Dream, No Romantic Relationship(s)
Comments: 230
Kudos: 304





	1. Strange Things

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry this is not an update. Well technically yes, but actually no.
> 
> I'm sorry for making you guys waiting for so long, but end up making you guys disappointed.
> 
> I have an announcement to make. I decide to rewrite this story. Actually, I just realize that the plot is really rushed so I'm having a difficulty on writing the next chapter. I spent many times on thinking and writing the concept for the 4th chapter but I can't find a good plot to write.
> 
> This is the first story I post on AO3 and I actually didn't plan to write a long story about this. I planned it to finish in 2 or 3 chapters but it seems impossible now. After I posted the first 3 chapter and reread it several times, I felt...odd. After some long thinking, I come with this decision!
> 
> For the umpteenth time, I'm sorry. Words can't describe how sorry I am. I really, really happy that you guys enjoy my story. I didn't expect y'all to like this story qwq
> 
> Thank you very much and sorry for the inconvenience!

Nightmare just noticed after some battle that Dream changed his clothing style. A lot. It’s more…how he said it. It’s thicker than before? He wears trousers, black shirt, long sleeves, gloves, a vest, boots and his favorite yellow cape. Was Dream influenced by Ink? Why the heck he wears so many layers? It seems troublesome.

Nightmare begin to notice other thing after purposely observing his younger brother, battle after battle. Dream always protect his long sleeves (beside his yellow cape). No matter how much Dream’s clothes had shattered, he protected his sleeves the most. Even more so than his cape. So even when his clothes were torn, his long sleeves leave untouched.

Nightmare notice it as something really…strange. Maybe he was just over-thinking? The former guardian brushed off the bad feeling he just felt.

Well, it’s sure was suspicious. But it’s probably nothing.

_‘It’s probably nothing right? Maybe he just loves that long sleeves like he loves that old cape,’_

Something told him there’s something wrong. But he ignores it.

_‘There’s nothing wrong, **nothing,** ’_

Nightmare shakes his head, and back focusing on his paper works. Hoping that his paper works will distract him from his random mind.

He can’t.

* * *

Maybe it has been around half a year since Dream changed his attire, and also the first time Nightmare notice strange things about Dream. The more he observed his twin, the more he found some other…strange things.

First, he just found out how busy Dream is. He’s very busy until he didn’t seem to have time for himself. He’s either fight him, help Ink to fight Error, taking care of some business in some different universes, or simply helping random people. Honestly, even Nightmare has day off.

The second thing he found was, how rare Dream’s facial expression change. He literally always smiling. Except in battlefield. He always had a serious expression in battlefield. But other than that, he always smiling. No matter how annoying the people he was talking to. He’s more expressive when he was talking to Ink and or Blue though. Compared to his smile and laugh with people who's not too close to him, his smile and laugh looks more genuine. And both Blue and he often smacks Ink’s head when the creator does or say something stupid. His eyes twitching irritably when he does that.

The last thing he found was that Dream is living alone at an empty timeline of a former genocide AU. Nightmare remember Error once complain about an empty universe he failed to destroy because Ink stopped him. Maybe this universe was the one Error talked about.

How he found all of that fact? He has his own way. Don’t ask.

And no. It’s not because he’s worried. He’s not worried. Not at all. Just simply curious. And no. He won’t ambush his brother's home. Sure, he's evil but even he won’t stop that low. He prefers to attack some universe full of sentient beings, thank you very much.

Nightmare has been laying down on his bed for hours. Just staring at the ceiling without reason. Well, he just met Dream. Not in a battle He can’t stop thinking about his brother lately. He admitted there’s something wrong about Dream, but somehow, he can’t put his finger on it.

_‘I’m…probably just over-thinking, I should stop doing this, he’s alright, he’s the guardian of positivity after all, what’s the worse can happen right? He has many allies, I really should stop being over-thinking and just sleep,’_

He closes his eye and fell asleep. While thinking about his brother, of course. Not that he would admit that out loud.

 _‘Keep telling yourself that Nightmare, it won’t end well for you,'_ a voice, annoyingly his voice whispers something to his head.

_'Shut the fuck up brain, I’m trying to sleep,'_

Nightmare start to think that maybe he had gone crazy. Talking to himself like that.

* * *

_I don’t remember what I was doing before but before I know it, I open my eyes and found myself in the middle of forest. I didn’t remember coming to this forest. I didn’t even recognize it. This forest is annoyingly bright from the sunset. It’s peaceful though._

_I wonder what is this place. Maybe I can find something after I find the way out._

_Then, I hear something. I follow that sound, and it leads me to more open area. I can feel my body stiffen after I saw a familiar figure not too far from me._

_I saw Dream. His back is facing me and he’s sitting on a cliff edge while humming a random song._

_“What are you doing here?” I ask with cold tone._

_“Hm?” he turns around to face me._

_“Oh, hello brother! What are you doing here?” he greets with a happy smile._

_“I asked **you** , what are you doing here?” I asked one more time with deadlier tone, ignoring his question._

_He seems unaffected at all. His expression as calm as ever._

_“Me? I’m just enjoying the view, beautiful isn’t it? Want to sit beside me?”_

_“No, thanks,” I answer coldly. But he just shrugs and turn his gaze back to the scenery in front of him._

_“Okay then,”_

_No one talk after that. But for some reasons, I just…can’t leave. Not yet._

_“I don’t mind dying with this beautiful scenery,” he says suddenly with a chuckle. Like he said something funny. A joke. A sick joke._

_It’s not funny. Not at all._

_“If you said that provoke me, don’t get your hope high,”_

_“What? Of course not, I don’t have any reason to provoke you anyway, I know you don’t care either I life or die,” the guardian laughs softly._

_Something was tugging at my soul._

_“Actually, I just…I’m sorry brother, I’m so, so sorry but I…I can’t take this anymore,” he said. He’s smiling softly._

_“What are you talking about?” I growled a little._

_He changes into standing position. His soft gaze somehow bothers me._

_What is he planning?_

_“You can rest assured Nightmare, I won’t disturb you again, I won’t try to intervene with your plan, I won’t even show my face in front of you anymore!” he said cheerfully._

_But it sounds out of place._

_Realization slap me hard._

_And I can’t move from my place. It’s like something is holding me down. I cursed mentally._

_“Dream, stay away from that cliff!”_

_He’s grinning when I said that._

_“Nope! This is what you want isn’t it?”_

_His position is dangerously closer to the edge._

_~~No.~~ _

_“Come here right now!” I snapped at him. But he remains unfazed._

_“Don’t wanna! I already made my decision! I already tried some way to make you happy, and well, I failed, sadly, but! Now I know what I have to do! As a good brother I want to make you happy!” he smiles cheerfully._

_Something…stab my soul. I don’t know what. But that damn smile is bothering me._

_~~Stop it.~~ _

_“Even it means I have to die,”_

_He takes one step back._

**_~~Shut up.~~ _ ** ~~~~

_Nothing has ever scare me. If anything, I am the reason for someone to be scared. But this. I don’t know that I’m this scared._

_“Dream. I said. Stay. Away. From that cliff,”_

_~~I don’t know…~~ _

_“Why I have to?”_

_“Because you can’t do that!”_

_~~…I never realize…~~ _

_“Why can’t I?” he ‘innocently’ tilting his head, taking two steps back._

_I stare at him horrified._

_Shit. Why the hell I can’t fucking move?!_

_“Dream please! You can’t!”_

_~~…that I’m…~~ _

_He seemed to think for a moment._

_“Maybe you’re right, I can’t…”_

_~~…this scared…~~ _

_A single tear runs down his cheek. But he’s still smiling. His smile is so…damn peaceful it pissed me off._

_“…I can’t do this anymore,”_

_Dream closes his eyes. Like he’s ready to embraced the death itself…as he takes one last step backward._

_~~…of losing him.~~ _

_But there’s nothing he can step on._

_"NO!"_

* * *

Nightmare jerked up from his sleep. He’s breathing rapidly. His vision blurred a little before he blinks a few times. The only source of light in his room is the moonlight that went through his window but he recognized his own room.

Not a sunset. Not a cliff. It’s his bedroom.

_‘What…what the hell was that?’_

He remembers it clearly. Terrifyingly clear. He lets out a choked laugh _._

_‘Shit, why…’_

The corrupted guardian covered his mouth to prevent the sobs that threatened to escape.

_‘…why my tears can’t stop flowing?’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't plan it to be that different from the former story, I just add a lot of scene so it would make more sense than before. Hopefully.
> 
> By the way, in my theory Dream, despite being the guardian of positive feeling, tends to have depression. I just think, how can he, a little 'child' (I saw at wiki that he's mentally 12 years old when the apple incident happen, correct me if I wrong), just be 'okay' when he lost everything he once had? His brother, the only family he had, left him alone in a destroyed universe. Alone.
> 
> Like, wow, just how strong he can be? Maybe if I was him I had gone insane. Also, I think Dream is the type who keep everything to himself, and act strong for other's sake. And he is a great 'actor'. So great even Nightmare can't see or sense it for a long time.
> 
> I didn't blame them. Sure either twins have their own mistake. But in my opinion, if there are someone to blame, it was those fortunately death villagers.
> 
> Anyway, Dreamtale is an amazing story! It's my favorite AU and I'm grateful that Joku create those amazing twins!
> 
> Thanks for coming to my ted talk! If you please, you can give me your opinion :))


	2. Sinister Voices

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> People often focus on someone's mistakes until the point they didn't care about their kindness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains self-harm and negative-thoughts. If you feel you'll be triggered or uncomfortable with this kind of writing please, please don't read this.

“Guardians?! You still call yourselves guardians after letting them die?!”

“We already tried to come here as fast as we can but we also caught up in another fight before coming here,” Ink tried to explain to the angry rabbit monster. Some monsters also glaring at them and it really made them uncomfortable.

“But it’s your duty to keep us safe! You can just ditch the fight and come here faster!” the other monster snapped.

“Now wait a damn second−”

Blue step forward before Ink can speak something…impolite. Or hurt someone. Or both.

“We’ve tried our best sir, we’re really sorry we can’t get here faster,” Blue also tried to calm the monsters.

“That’s not an excuse!”

They’ve just succeeded in drove Error away from this universe. Not to mention they just fought Nightmare’s gang beforehand. They’re exhausted for Asgore’s sake!

Indeed, this is not the first time the guardians treated like this. It’s still unpleasant when it happens though. Ink’s eyes change into the dangerous red target. It seems his red paint’s effect from the previous battle hasn’t disappeared completely.

“Listen here you little−”

Before Ink can get any angrier, Dream also interfere. He pulls Ink behind him and smiles calmly.

“We’re really sorry for your loss sir, we’re also sorry for the damage we’ve caused here, we promise to come here again to repair this village after resting for a while,”

“We want our families back! Not the properties!”

“Do you think their lives can be replaced by that?!”

The other villagers also start to shout at them.

“But we’re not a god, we can’t revive the dead,” it seems Blue’s patience also getting thinner. He’s starting to look irritated no matter how he tries to stay patient.

“I doubt Life allowed to do that anyway,” Ink whispers annoyedly.

The negativity around them starts to affect Dream. His _~~fake~~_ smile is twitching slightly. Blue holds Dream’s hand in a reassuring manner. Dream silently whispers ‘thanks’ to his friend which replied by a smile.

“Enough,” a deep voice spoke and the angry villagers went silent instantly.

Asgore Dreemur steps up into the scene with his wife beside him.

“I apologize for my people’s rudeness, thank you very much for your hard work,” he said as both the king and queen bow to them.

“N-no! It’s not something Your Majesties need to apologize for so please lift your head,” Blue politely replies.

The queen and king lift their head and smile softly.

“No, we’re really sorry for our people, thank you for your help, we don’t know how to repay you,” Toriel said with his motherly tone.

“You don’t have to repay us, your majesty, it’s our duty to keep this universe safe, we’re sorry for your people’s loss,” Dream bows. Followed by Ink and Blue.

“Lift your head guardians, it’s not your fault, we understand you also have other ‘business’ to taken care of,”

“Thanks for your understanding your majesty, now if you excuse us, I just want to lay down on my bed right now,”

“Ink! That was impolite!” Blue smacked Ink’s head.

“What?! I’m exhausted okay?!”

“It doesn’t mean you can act impolite towards them!”

“Guuuys, stop it! You’re embarrassing me,” Dream separated his friends before they start arguing.

“What? You can get embarrassed?” the creator smiles mockingly.

“Excuse me I’m not you,” the other guardian fired back.

“What did you just say−”

“Uh, why you guys are the one who’s fighting now−”

Asgore and Toriel laugh at the Star Sanses childish fight. Blue and Dream who realize that they’re still in front of the king and queen blushed while Ink remains ignorant.

“You must be exhausted, you can rest here if you want? We can prepare an empty hotel room for you,”

“Thanks for your kindness your majesties, but I’m afraid we have to refuse,” Dream answered.

“We’re more comfortable resting at our place, but thanks for the offer your majesties,” Blue added.

“Very well then, be careful on your way home,”

* * *

The universe where Dream lives is a peaceful place. No one lives there except Dream. And some animals in the forest around there. After fighting they like to stay at Dream’s place for a while to at least recover their magic. Like usual, they're laying down together under a random tree. Not sleeping. Just…simply laying down and enjoying the nice weather.

“That was too harsh, they’re so rude! I can’t believe them!” Ink grumbles. Still getting annoyed by the previous event.

“It can’t be helped, they lost their loved one,” Dream responds with a sad tone.

“Well, that’s true but it doesn’t mean they can act rudely toward us,” Blue argues.

“For a moment I thought I should've let Error destroy them,” Ink said with a joking tone.

“I would be lying if I say I didn’t think about it, they’re the rudest monsters we've encountered so far,” the Underswap Sans agreed, surprisingly.

Dream laugh at that. He probably thought Ink and Blue’s words are a joke.

Blue and Ink glance at each other. Well, they’re not serious. But it wasn’t entirely a joke either. They’re half-serious. Dream will probably scold them if he knows. The other two laugh awkwardly.

“Hey Dream?” Blue called.

“Hm?”

Blue is looking at him with a reassuring smile on his face.

“Don’t take it personally okay? They didn’t mean it, it’s just their usual emotional outburst,”

“Thanks Blue, it’s not their fault anyway, I didn’t mind it a bit,” the guardian smiles back.

_~~It’s your fault Dreamy~~ _

_~~There are so many victims and you can’t save them~~ _

_‘Ugh, I need time alone, as soon as possible before I lose my control,’_

“Dream? Are you okay? You’re spacing out,”

“Huh? Sorry, I feel more tired than usual, today was exhausting isn’t it?”

“Oh, you want to rest in your house aren’t you? Blue and I will go home then, I’ve recovered my magic by now!” Ink jump a little to stand. He’s as energetic as always.

Dream and Blue also stand following their artist friend.

“I-I didn’t mean to drove you out guys,” Dream looks at his friends guiltily.

“We understand Dream, we know you didn’t mean that. You need to rest properly, okay?”

“Today was indeed exhausting, you don’t have to feel guilty about it,”

At his concerned friends, Dream smiles.

“Thank you,”

“No need to thank us, it’s no biggie, see you later Dream!” Ink grins widely.

“See you Dream! Have a good rest!” Blue said as he waves his hand to Dream.

“See you later guys!” Dream waves back.

Dream’s smile disappears the moment Blue and Ink disappear in a puddle of ink. His knees give up almost instantly and the guardian cowers on the ground.

_~~Guardians?! You still call yourself guardians after letting them die?!~~ _

_~~Useless! Failure! Failurefailurefailure−~~ _

_~~You can’t save them!~~ _

_~~We want our families back!~~ _

Hurthurthurteverythingshurtstopplease−

Dream closes his ears and clenches his head. With some magic he managed to recover, the guardian teleport as far as he can to reach his house. He ended up crashing on his bed, fortunately.

_~~Guardian? Are you even worth that tittle?~~ _

Dream groans a little. One hand still clenching his head while the other one tries to reach something on his nightstand beside his bed. When his hand can feel a cold metal, he immediately grips it, firmly, without knowing that he grips the sharp side of the metal. He yelps in surprise and accidentally drops the metal.

Red. His glove absorbs the red liquid, making it changes its color from yellow to red.

“Ugh, I have to buy a new glove,” he mumbles.

_~~You’re so clumsy~~ _

_‘I know,’_ Dream picks up the little metal. A small knife.

_~~No wonder you always failed~~ _

_‘I said **I know** ,’ _he removes his gloves.

_~~You can’t even do something as simple as picking up a knife~~ _

_‘Stop it,’_ he removes his black sleeves.

_~~What a depressed guardian of positi−~~ _

Quickly, he ‘draw’ a line on his right arm. With his little sharp knife.

Those voices, finally fall silent. Dream sighed and let out a dry chuckle.

_‘The depressed guardian of positivity huh? That’s new,’_

He stares at the new line on his arms. Blood dripping from both his new cut on his arms and his hand that accidentally grip the wrong side of the knife.

_~~The depressed guardian indeed~~ _

A sinister chuckle ringing in his head.

A new red line.

The sinister sound died down a little.

On the third line, the sound almost inaudible. But still there.

He makes two new red lines on his other arm.

The sound is finally gone.

He sighed blissfully.

* * *

Nightmare suddenly drops his phone when he felt a glimpse of strong negative emotion. A really, really strong negative emotion. It happened so fast. Just a split second. But he swore he felt it. It was too strong to ignore.

This is the first time Nightmare felt a negative emotion that left bad taste aftermath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I admit this chapter is...dark. This is not as fluffy as my other story indeed. Thank you for reading! Please tell me your opinion about this chapter :))


	3. Suspicions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream loses his control recently.

Nightmare, who suddenly dropped his phone and freezes made his comrades stare at him with a questioning gaze.

 _‘That was one hell of strong negativity,’_ Nightmare thought.

He can recognize that strong negativity. There’s only one thing that can pull off such strong negativity like that.

Depression.

He just felt it for a split second yet it was the strongest depression he has ever felt. He didn’t understand. How can how someone feel a depression just for a split second? He didn’t even have the chance to process where did it come from or who caused it.

“Is there something wrong boss?” Killer asked.

“…no, it was nothing, prepare an attack for tomorrow,”

“Tomorrow? Didn’t we just, attack an AU today?” Dust asked confusedly.

Well, they rarely attack an AU 2 days in a row. Like, almost never. But Nightmare always has a reason for what he does so it’s not like it was a strange thing for him to act unusual.

“Just do as I said,” Nightmare growled.

After picking up his phone, Nightmare just…leave. Probably went to his room. They stare at each other in confusion.

“He’s in a bad mood, isn’t he?” Cross said with a small voice.

“Probably, welp, just do as he said,” Horror replies. The others nodded in agreement.

* * *

Nightmare didn’t actually plan to seriously attack an AU. He just needs to…make sure of something. Ink and Blue are fighting against his boys at the town while Nightmare purposely separated Dream from the other two to somewhere else.

They’ve arrived at the Snowdin Forest before Dream realizes it. Away from the others. It’s not like he had time to care for that. He just wants to chase Nightmare out from this AU so he can rest immediately. His hand is hurt as hell he can’t manage to shoot his arrow accurately like usual. He can’t even grip his bow properly. Not going to mention his head is ringing non-stop he can’t think straight.

 _‘Ugh, I shouldn’t have injured my hand, this is so troublesome,’_ the guardian thought.

Throughout their battle, Nightmare was more observing silently than attacking.

Dream is strangely slow today. The Star Sanses, despite being…smaller than usual Sanses, is extremely agile. Usually.

There was a brief moment where Dream couldn’t hide his wince, a small grimace of pain while gripping his bow. His shot wasn’t as good as usual. His arrow often missed its target. Nightmare didn’t have the difficulty to avoid it like he usually had. It’s so easy.

“Have you lost your ability, guardian?” his question for once didn’t have a mocking tone. Not that Dream notice that anyway.

“Shut up,” Dream looks pissed.

Strange. Usually it takes more than that to piss him off. Nightmare didn’t even taunt him like usual.

Nightmare has realized it for a long time but never had the chance to ask Dream. He doubts Dream would answer him anyway. But he always wonders, like how right now, Dream strangely ‘feels’ happy but his expression is seriously pissed.

“Sometimes I wonder, you look pissed but I neither feel your annoyance nor your anger, I wonder why?”

For a split second Nightmare saw Dream’s body stiffens but the guardian didn’t answer him. Instead, his trembling hands summon an arrow. But looking at his state, Dream doesn’t like capable of attacking him.

“Your arms are shaking so much,” Nightmare comments.

Dream, after realizing that Nightmare walk closer to him, immediately jump back. Nightmare also stopped walking closer. It seems like a bad idea to approach his brother this time. The guardian hung his head, looking anywhere but his brother.

_‘I…I want to escape, I don’t want to be here any longer, I don’t want to be with him any longer, b-but what about Ink and Blue? Are they alright? Is it okay if I retreat by myself? What if−'_

“How can you attack me if you couldn’t even look at me properly? Are you hiding something from me?” now Nightmare’s tone is serious.

Even with that comment Dream still doesn’t want to look him in the eye. When he finally looks at Nightmare, he grips his bow as tight as possible and shot his arrow. His shot this time was enough to surprise Nightmare and make him take a few steps back.

Now he can’t hide his grimace of pain. The guardian hissed and looking at his hand.

 _‘Great, my wound opened again, just great,'_ Dream thought.

Nightmare can’t help but surprised when he saw one of Dream's yellow gloves slowly soaked with red. Blood. The guardian quickly hides his hand but Nightmare already saw it. And asking spontaneously.

“What’s wrong with your hand?” Nightmare, for once almost couldn’t hide his concern. But that tone escapes his voice.

_‘Did he just…worry about me?’_

_~~Nah. It’s impossible for him to worry about you~~ _

_~~If he knows, he'll think you're weak! Hahahaha!~~ _

Right. If his brother knows…he will probably mock him. Or make him feel even worse.

_‘His concern probably just my imagination,’_

_~~Of course, it is.~~ _

The guardian, for the first time, is spacing out. In front of Nightmare of all people. If it was someone else, they would probably get killed.

Dream is looking at Nightmare but not actually looking at Nightmare? He looks, lost? Like he saw something Nightmare couldn’t.

_~~Why would he care about you in the first place? You’re such a nuisance aren’t you~~~ _

“Dream?”

The voice inside Dream’s head suddenly change. It sounds a lot like Nightmare’s voice.

Dream blinks, but…

_~~He found Nightmare, staring coldly at him.~~ _

_~~“This is your fault, I became like this is your fault,”~~ _

“I’m asking you,”

_~~Nightmare’s expression is full of hatred. Full of resentment.~~ _

_~~“You betrayed me,”~~ _

_~~“Traitor. Useless. Weak. Failure. Nuisance,”~~ _

Dream clench his head. The ringing just got louder. The voices didn’t stop either.

_‘Shutupshutupshutup−’_

“Hey, are you even listening−”

“SHUT UP!”

At Dream’s sudden outburst Nightmare stiffened.

Nightmare likes to think that he’s always right. But for this once. Just this once. He wants to be wrong. He wants that waves of strong negativity from Dream right now, that was terrifyingly similar to what he felt yesterday, wasn’t actually his.

Indeed, Nightmare wanted to make sure of his suspicion yesterday. But something, something in the corner of his head, desperately hoping that’s not true. Hoping that his suspicion was wrong.

Dream, just realizing what he did, stares back at his brother in horror. The strong negativity is quickly being suppressed.

That was just another prove Nightmare found.

This is why Nightmare only felt that strong negativity in a split second yesterday.

Dream can control his emotions. He can control which emotions he _wants_ Nightmare to feel. And he has done a very great job of controlling it.

The guardian, even Nightmare can’t feel his negative emotion, looks so scared. Terrified even. His body is shaking violently. Slowly, he takes some steps back.

_‘He…he probably realized it now, he knew, this is bad, this is the worst, I-I have to get out of here, I can’t stay here any longer, I need…I need my knife,’_

“I-I wasn’t−I didn’t mean to−I-I’m−I’m sorry,”

Before Nightmare can realize what is Dream going to do, the guardian disappeared from his sight.

“…fuck,”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you like this chapter! If you have a question, feel free to ask! :D


	4. I'm Here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nightmare just...couldn't understand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote longer than I planned ._.
> 
> Enjoy :D

Dream just teleport without thinking anymore. He didn't teleport that far from Snowdin Forest. He just needs to be away from Nightmare. He’s running. As fast as he can. To somewhere. Somewhere so he can open a portal without anyone following him. He wants to go home. He wants to be alone.

His vision got a bit blurry. When he blinks, tears run down his cheeks.

_‘Why?! Why I lost control in front of him of all people?!’_

_~~He must be really disappointed.~~ _

_~~As if betraying him is not enough for you huh?~~ _

He needs something to distract him from the pain in his chest. He needs something to distract him from those ‘voices’. From his own mind. From his headache. From the recent accident. From Nightmare.

After making sure no one following him, the guardian opens a portal straight to his bedroom and crashed on his bedroom floor. He’s breathing rapidly.

_~~You’re so useless, Dream~~ _

The tears he tried so hard to hold fell from his eyes again.

 _‘No, no, please anything but his voice,’_ he pleads.

But it wasn't like his own head will listen to him anyway.

_~~You’re giving me a new reason to hate you, dear brother of mine~~ _

“Control, control yourself Dream, you lost your control several times lately, don’t. Lose. It. Again. Control it, suppress it, endure it,” the guardian whispers to himself.

“This is your punishment Dream, you deserve it, this is the results from your ignorance, your stupidity, just…endure it, you have to be strong, for everyone’s sake, for multiverse’s sake, come on! Pull yourself together!”

_~~I’m looking forward to the moment you’ll break, you hypocrite~~ _

“I-It's not like y-you're not used to it, aren't you? D-don’t…don’t lose…y-your hope, p-pull yourself together Dream, d-don’t…give...up, hiks,”

It comes again. The sinister laughter. Ringing like crazy.

His eyes caught a glimpse of a shining metal at the corner of his room.

* * *

Nightmare teleports straight to Dream’s house. Because that was the only place he could think of.

The universe where Dream lives is already dark but the moon is shining brightly. Dream’s house is also shining with a faint yellow color from the light inside the house. There's a faint sound of crickets and other insects from the forest not too far from Dream’s house. It’s so…peaceful.

Now he’s here, what should he do? Knock the door? Destroy it? The latter sounds better. Then what? It has been so long since the last time they talk properly. He hasn't even prepared what he wants to talk about.

_‘Ugh, where’s my oh-so-many-knowledge when I need it?! Why doesn’t he just feel my presence and approach me first? That would be easier for me,’_

For some seconds he’s just…glaring at the front door. Like the door can melt under his glare.

_‘You know what? Screw it,’_

Without hesitation, he destroys the front door with his tendrils.

The loud clanking sound from a metal that hit the floor immediately draw Nightmare’s attention. His turquoise eye light met a surprised look from Dream’s yellow eye lights. For a moment the twins are locking eyes with each other. Dream’s eye sockets widen in surprise.

After some moment Nightmare shifted his gaze, and unable to look away. From those arms, that for once aren’t covered with sleeves. From those arms, that full of scars. Red lines. Many of them. Some are old. Some are new. Nightmare also saw blood. The blood, that's still dripping on the floor.

Nightmare feels…something inside him burning. Seething. But on the other hand, he feels sad? Guilt?

 _‘How? How come it turned out like this? I don’t…I don’t understand,’_ Nightmare almost can’t believe what he just saw.

 _‘Why he’s here? How did he know my house?!’_ Dream panicked internally.

He’s so confused right now he even forgets his bloodied arms.

“W-wha-what are you doing here? And how did you know−”

“Dream what the hell?!”

The guardian flinched.

 _‘What happened? What did I miss? I never once thought of a possibility he could become like this!’_ the corrupted guardian curse himself.

 _‘I can’t believe it, what have I done?’_ Nightmare never feels this angry. He’s so angry he wants to scream. Towards what? Towards who? Why? How? Questions circling around his head as he finally snapped.

“I can’t believe you’ve done this!”

Silence. Nightmare’s eye socket widened the moment he realized what he said. Dream, if anything looks even more terrified.

_‘No, shit, fuck, that came out wrong, I didn’t mean to say that−’_

Nightmare wants to…do something. Anything but make his brother even more terrified. But the inner conflict inside him is making him confused and emotional.

“U-uh, I’m s-so-sorry, I-I’ll just…”

After saying that, the guardian disappears. Again.

Then Nightmare hears the sound of a door being slammed and locked.

He can also teleport there if he wants. But decided not to. At least not yet.

Nightmare sighs deeply to calm himself. This is not the time to feel angry. Or frustrated. He can deal with those feelings later. He must remain calm. Without making any sound, Nightmare walk inside Dream’s house.

After a while, he found a cream-colored door. That he suspects as Dream’s room. He knocks a few times.

“Dream? Are you in there?”

“LEAVE!”

Nightmare flinched a little at that. It was the second time Nightmare heard Dream raised his voice.

He probably thinks it’s pointless to pretend in front of Nightmare. He already saw too much. He knew too much.

Nightmare doesn’t need to feel Dream’s feeling to know what he feels right now but still, he can’t understand how Dream manages to control his feeling in his current state.

“Dream, can we just−”

“I said leave me alone! J-Just leave me like you always did! Y-you’re good at doing that aren’t you?”

Nightmare can’t help but smile bitterly at that. Dream’s words actually sting a little, yet Nightmare can’t take that seriously. Maybe if Dream said it with a colder tone or mocking tone, Nightmare would get angry or annoyed and leave.

But with that broken tone, how can Nightmare leave him alone?

“If you try to make me angry or something so I would leave you with that kind of statement, you better try again, you’re never good at being rude Dream,”

Dream doesn’t answer again. Nightmare takes that as a yes.

It looks like his brother won’t open his door anytime soon.

_‘I don’t have a choice then,’_

Nightmare closes his eyes for a moment and reappears in a different room.

It was dark. But he used to see in the darkness anyway. The room he’s in is…messy. Like, really messy. There’s a table with many papers and books on it. Some crumbled papers scattered around the floor. The bedsheet aren't even being used properly. He caught a glimpse _~~a lot~~_ of red and Nightmare immediately shifted his gaze. Then, he found his brother.

Dream is sitting at the corner of his room, hugging his legs and hiding his face. But from his trembling shoulders Nightmare can tell he’s crying. Or at least, try to not cry.

“You can kill me now,” Dream said suddenly without looking at him. His voice is hoarse.

Wait.

“What?”

“I won’t fight you, you can kill me straight or torture me for all I care,”

Nightmare can't blame him for thinking like that.

His tendrils that’s swaying behind him, that he often uses to hurt his brother, for once didn’t have any malicious intent. Instead, it wrapped loosely around Dream’s shoulders.

_~~A tentacle wrapped around his neck. Practically strangling him.~~ _

_~~“Give me the last golden apple,”~~ _

The guardian flinched. His body is trembling even worse than before. Nightmare quickly put his tendrils away. Well, it didn’t seem like a good idea to use his tendrils right now. The faint sigh of relief told him that he made the right decision.

Nightmare thought about something he’s about to do next.

 _‘That will make everything awkward,’_ Nightmare considers it for a moment and make his decision.

Nightmare walks closer to where Dream sat. Carefully, he wrapped his arms around his younger twin. Dream stiffens for a moment before relaxing into the hug. Maybe after making sure Nightmare didn’t intend to hurt him.

It has been a long time since the last time Nightmare hugs his brother. Even since they were a child, Dream is always been smaller than him. Yet the Dream in his arms now is a lot smaller than he remembers.

Has he always living alone like this? Can he take care of himself? Did he eat properly? Did he get enough sleep? Is he lonely? Is he happy like Nightmare always thought?

“…what are you doing?” Dream asks with a small voice, distracting Nightmare from his thought.

“…being here for you, like I should have done those centuries ago,”

Dream's defense wall destroyed instantly. His pain, his agony, his loneliness, all negative emotions he always hid, Nightmare can feel it all. Nightmare hugs his brother even tightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY DREAM GOT HIS HUG :D
> 
> Thanks for reading! Oh, and also thanks for the kudos and your kind words! It makes me really happy :D


	5. His Sunshine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He realized it far too late. But it's better than nothing...right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know they're not real. I know both of them are a fictional character but I still cried when I think about what they've been gone through...especially the angst. Help :')
> 
> By the way, I want to write at least one chapter each fic I wrote before I take the final semester exams qwq

Dream feels…warm. If he’s dreaming, he doesn’t want to wake up. Staying in a nice dream like this sounds nice. The warmth. The peace. It has been so long since the last time he feels this peaceful. This safe.

He feels so happy it makes him want to cry.

But…he should have known that his happiness wouldn’t last for too long.

“Sssh, it’s okay, you can let it out, you can stop holding back,” a familiar voice, deep yet soft at the same time, soothed him.

 _ ~~“Wake up Dreamy~ Don’t get too carried away with this nice feeling~”~~_ the same voice, yet with different tone mixed with different words.

Which one is real? The guardian wonders.

Or…maybe, what’s happening right now is indeed his illusion?

_~~“Aw, did you really just realize it now?”~~ _

_‘He’s right, why would Nightmare bother to come here? I can die and he probably wouldn’t even care,’_

Dream’s relaxed body suddenly stiffens again. Nightmare can feel a sudden change of feeling from his brother. He felt so calm after Nightmare hugs him for a while, but suddenly he can feel darkness creep in.

 _‘This is bad, his positive feelings start to fade again,’_ Nightmare thought.

“Dream listen to me,”

_~~“Listen to me Dreamy~”~~ _

Dream is gripping his forearms to stop his shaking. His eye sockets shut tightly.

“Dream, whatever you’re hearing right now, they’re wrong, don’t listen to them,”

_~~“This is just an illusion, dear brother, you don’t deserve this warm feeling,”~~ _

Dream’s head hurts. But that deep, sinister voice is stronger than the soothing voice. Those two voices sound the same. But at the same time, it doesn’t.

“Dream, fight it,”

_~~“Give in Dream, why bother to fight? You will lose anyway, to your own insanity,”~~ _

Unconsciously, his fingers are clawing at his arm. Reopening the wounds that already healed, and making those wounds that haven’t healed even deeper.

Nightmare didn’t realize it at first. But the strong scent of blood caught his attention.

 _‘Shit, I forgot about that, my voice couldn’t reach him, he couldn’t hear me,’_ Nightmare cursed at himself.

The moment Nightmare pulled away, Dream feels cold all of sudden.

 _ ~~“See? That warmth just your illusion, it won’t last for too long, now who’s being hurt by that hope−”~~_ all of sudden, that voice stop mid-sentence.

He can feel someone is touching his head. That hands are…warm, as well as the magic that’s flowing through it. It calms him. The calming sensation…it makes him sleepy. Like, really sleepy.

_‘This calming sensation…it’s familiar, but I can’t remember…when was the last time…I felt…it,’_

Despite the sleepiness, Dream fights to lift his head and open his eye sockets, even for a short moment. His eyes met a glowing cyan eye. That familiar eye, which usually looks so cold and merciless, is now looking at him so softly. It reminds him of a pair of violet eyes, looking at him with the exact tender look. Even with different colors, Dream will never forget that look.

He wanted to say something. Anything. But…he can’t fight the sleepiness anymore.

_‘I…don't want…this illusion…to stop, if this is…a dream…I…’_

“I don’t…want to wake up,” the guardian whispered before he lost consciousness.

Nightmare’s eye socket widened at that. Before the guardian fall, Nightmare managed to catch him. He lifts him up while carefully not to touch Dream’s injuries.

Without looking Nightmare uses his tendrils to throw the ~~bloody~~ bed-sheets into the laundry basket and laid Dream down on the bed. For a moment he just...standing there. Staring at his brother's peaceful expression.

_“I don’t…want to wake up,”_

Dream’s last word before he lost consciousness echoed on his head. A grim smile appears on Nightmare’s face.

“We have so many things to talk about aren’t we?”

First thing first, he needs to treat those injuries.

He needs a towel and a bowl of warm water to clean those blood. And maybe some bandages. Sometimes he hopes he has healing magic. That would be very helpful in a situation like this.

He walks out from Dream’s room to the kitchen for a bowl of warm water. After he finished filling the bowl with warm water, he searches for a first aid box. Unfortunately, he couldn’t find it at the kitchen.

 _‘Maybe he put it at his bathroom?’_ he wonders.

He uses his tendrils to bring the bowl and walk around to find the bathroom. While searching for a bathroom he passed a room with the same door as Dream’s room. If he didn’t have an important task right now maybe he would take a look at the room. Something is telling him that he should check that room. He knows it’s not the right time to do that though. He’ll do that later.

After a while, Nightmare finally found a door that he thought as the bathroom.

Well, he’s not wrong.

But what he found inside actually surprised him. Again.

If Dream’s room was messy, the bathroom is even more concerning. There are bandages on the floor. It was already used. Those bandages are **red**. There’s also mirror shards scattered on the floor with red footprints.

Blood didn’t usually make him sick but the blood he had seen today strangely made him sick. He didn’t want to stay here any longer but the first aid box that stuck to the wall caught his attention. The former guardian walks so carefully so he won’t step on the shards. He found bandages in there. There are also some bottles with pills in it. Some of them are just regular medicine, like for cold or fever. But there are two bottles that catch his attention. It has a label on it.

−Sleeping pills. Nb: don’t you dare take more than one again or I won’t make these again for you because I **will** know if you do that-Sci−

−Antidepressant. Nb: stop pretending to forget to take your medicine, you’re not Ink-Sci−

Is there anything that could make him even more surprised? He found too many surprising things in one day. The more he knows, the more he realizes that he doesn't know his brother as he thought.

Nightmare knows how it feels to be depressed. He had it when he was still being a guardian of 'that' tree. Everybody loves his brother, but everybody hates him even when he didn't do anything wrong. He's being bullied, insulted, and isolated. He's an immortal. But he still had the mental age of a child. He also wanted to be loved. He wanted to be helpful like his twin.

After the apple incidents, he was alone. He cursed Dream to become a stone. He has no one. The misery, the loneliness, the regret, the sins he has committed, they haunted him. But then he met his comrades, one by one. Someone he could call as his family. Someone for him to turn back to. Someone for him to take care of so he can forget those dark feelings inside him.

While Killer, Horror, Dust, and Cross also have their own ‘problem’, their own presence healed him. From his loneliness. From his insanity. From his broken mind. They worked on it together. They have each other. They’re his ‘new’ family.

But sometimes, he missed those times. Those happy times, when he sat under the tree he had to protect while reading a book. His younger twin often whined childishly because Nightmare ignored him for a book. Before finally, Dream stop whining because Nightmare said he will read him a fairy-tale. Dream always said he loves Nightmare’s voice when he read him a story. His eyes would change into stars, excited. Without asking Dream put his head on his brother’s lap, smiling happily. While hearing Nightmare’s voice, Dream lulled to sleep. Even in his sleep, he’s still smiling happily. A genuine, contagious smile. After that Nightmare would stop reading, and follow him to the dreamland.

Nightmare loves his ‘new’ family dearly. But it won’t make him forget his ‘old’ family. The only family he once had. His only little sunshine in his once dark and depressing world.

But that little sunshine is gone now. Not only dimmed, but it’s also gone. Fell into the darkness, without someone to pull him back. And Nightmare realized it far too late.

Nightmare can only hope that he's not too late to pull him back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like it! Have a nice day! :D


	6. His Smile

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nightmare didn't remember that Dream ever smiled like he is now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I changed the title. For some reason. Hehe :>

Dream wake up at the sounds of chirping birds. His bedroom is bright from the sunshine that went through his windows. He feels…refreshed. It was rare for him to get a nice sleep without night terror. Like, almost never.

_At least without a sleeping pill._

Did he take a pill before he fell asleep?

Wait. What happened yesterday again?

_‘Let see, I was…I was walking to the kitchen to wash my arms because I haven’t cleaned up my bathroom, then…something…did something happen? Ugh, my head is a mess since yesterday,’_

He just noticed that his arms wrapped neatly in a clean bandage. Some are soaked in blood but not too much.

_‘Did I wrap my arms with these bandages last night? When? Why can’t I remember?’_

Suddenly, he can hear footsteps. And the sound of someone talking.

“Yeah, I’ll tell you after I decide when to come back, no, no, there’s no mission for today, you can sleep or play for all I care, just don’t burn or destroy my mansion, if something bad happens to my mansion you all are dead,”

He knew that voice. It was…Nightmare’s.

He’s here? In his house?! How?! When?! Why?!

Last night...last night.

He was walking to the kitchen. Then Nightmare came. He destroyed his front door. And he…saw him.

_‘Wasn’t that a dream? Wait, I was dreaming before, didn’t I? Which one is real?! What is he doing here?!’_

There’s a small click sound from his bedroom door. Quickly, Dream uses his blanket to cover himself. His soul is pounding. He can hear the footsteps walking closer.

“I know you’re awake,”

His tone is as cold as ever. There’s faint anger but it seems the older guardian tries to suppress it. For whatever reason it is. Did he make Nightmare angry again? What…what did he do this time though? Was he angry because he ran away from their fight yesterday? What should he do now?

“…”

Nightmare sighed. He pulls the blanket away from his brother and handed him a bowl.

“Eat,” he simply said.

…that was unexpected.

Dream slowly open his eyes. Nightmare is waiting. The younger twin sat and unsurely received the breakfast. It’s a bowl of warm chicken soup.

“U-um…thank…you?”

That came out as a question. He doesn’t know what kind of expression he has shown. Nightmare just huffed as a reply before sitting on the chair beside his bed and casually plays with his phone.

This is…really awkward. Dream looks awkward and can't hide it. He’s fidgeting a lot and avoid staring at him. Nightmare actually felt the same but he pretends to be calm by playing with his phone.

Dream stares at the chicken soup on his lap. It looks fine. Smells good too. And he’s hungry. Starving even. When was the last time he ate? After some thinking, Dream took a spoonful and swallows it.

Was it poisonous? Or maybe it was a prank? What was Nightmare thinking?

He waited for a while. Nothing happened. It tastes…okay. He takes another spoonful. Well, maybe it’s a little bit tasty. Another spoonful. Just…maybe more. Another. And another.

_‘Okay, it’s very tasty,’_

Before he realizes it, the bowl is empty. Wow.

“It has been so long since the last time I ate a decent meal,” the guardian murmured.

Nightmare can’t stop his surprised stare.

“What did you just say?”

_‘…I almost forget about his presence,’_

“N-nothing! T-thanks for the meal! I-I’ll wash the dish−”

Before the guardian can get off from his bed, Nightmare snatches the bowl from Dream’s hands.

“No, I’ll do that, your hand is still injured, don’t use it before it heals,”

With that Nightmare leave his bedroom.

Okay seriously. Nightmare’s act made him really confused. The guardian closes his eyes, digging into his memory.

Nightmare found him. Then he…ran (teleport?) to his bedroom? It’s a little bit fuzzy after that. Voices. A lot of voices. One of them was Nightmare’s.

The moment he remembers that a lot of voices come to his head at once.

_~~“Sssh, it’s okay, you can let it out, you can stop holding back,”~~ _

_~~“Wake up Dreamy~ Don’t get too carried away with this nice feeling~”~~ _

_~~“Dream listen to me,”~~ _

_~~“Listen to me Dreamy~”~~ _

_~~“Dream, whatever you’re hearing right now, they’re wrong, don’t listen to them,”~~ _

_~~“This is just an illusion dear brother, you don’t deserve this warm feeling,”~~ _

_‘O-ouch, my…head, i-it’s hurt…w-what am I hearing…w-which one is…real? I remember…warmth? Pain? L-loud, it’s hurthurthurth−’_

“What are you doing?!”

His hands suddenly being pulled away from his skull.

Dream can feel…Nightmare’s feeling. The anger he was suppressing. His sadness. His fear. His panic.

Why…why he feels those emotions though? Nightmare is an embodiment of negativity, that’s for sure. But those emotion is nothing like him. Anger maybe yes. But something like sadness and fear? No. If anything _he’s the one_ who usually _makes _people felt like that.

“Wasn’t that enough?!” the older suddenly snap.

Dream blinks a few times.

“W-what do you mean−”

“Stop pretending you didn’t understand!”

 _‘No, really, I don’t understand what are you talking about just now,’_ unfortunately Dream couldn’t say that out loud. Afraid of making Nightmare even angrier.

First, Nightmare is in the same room as him, without trying to kill him. Second, he made Dream a breakfast (and it was delicious, he admitted). Third, he even washed the dish. Now he suddenly screamed at him?

Dream couldn’t grasp that much information at the same time. Not to mention he just woke up. His head can’t work as fast as it usually did just yet.

“Why you clawed at your skull just now?! Wasn’t it enough for you to hurt yourse−”

“…I did?”

Nightmare stop at Dream's whisper.

Looking at Dream’s confused expression, it didn’t seem he was lying. Nightmare takes a deep breath to calm himself. His anger won’t get him anywhere so he let go of Dream’s wrists and back to his seat.

Dream has many questions right now.

_‘What are you doing here?’_

_‘How did you know where I live?’_

_‘How much…how much did you know?’_

And mainly…

“How long will you stay here?” in a veeery uncomfortable expression.

“Are you kicking me out right now?”

_‘Did he hear what I think? Or…crap, I said it out loud, wasn’t it? Why I said that of all things?!’_

Looking at now Dream’s quick change of expression from confused to panic, it’s obvious he didn’t mean to say that. He’s easy to read once he let his guard down (whether he’s aware of it or not). Nightmare knew that his brother is too polite to actually say that. Even to him. Nightmare rolled his eye exasperatedly.

“Yes, you said that out loud,”

Dream laughs awkwardly.

“W-well, I didn’t mean to kick you out, I was just asking,”

Awkward silence again.

“Don't you have something to tell me?”

Well, Nightmare isn’t the one who can make small talk. He didn’t actually mean to talk with a cold tone like he had just done. But honestly? He just doesn’t know how to act around Dream. It has been so long since the last time they talk properly like this, just the two of them.

“No…thing I guess?” he answered unsurely.

Nightmare seems upset and disappointed at the same time.

Oh boy. He gave a wrong answer, wasn’t he?

“I…listen, I don’t…I never expected everything to…went downhill like this,” Nightmare starts, whatever he wanted to talk about.

Now Dream can see the clear nervousness from his twin. It’s strange since Nightmare usually so collected.

“I know it took a long time for me to realize, I just…I just realized that I never understand you like I thought I was, all this time I always thought that…you’re happy, but−”

Dream’s expression changed so fast before Nightmare knew it. He seems so…cheerful with a smile on his face.

“What do you mean? I **am** always happy,” he said.

Was it just him, or was Dream’s instant reply sounds…a little concerning? For some reason, Dream’s reply and smile disturb him. Like, a lot. Is it possible for someone to look so ‘innocent and happy’ but fake at the same time? After all, Dream was so nervous and awkward before. Yet he’s smiling so cheerfully right now. _Too cheerful_ to the point Nightmare feels uncomfortable just by looking at him.

"Did you always smile like this? To deceive everyone?"

Dream's expression hardened ever so slightly but his smile didn't falter.

"I don't know what are you talking about, I'm always smiling like this, didn't you remember?"

* * *

_"Brotheeer! Play with meee!"_

_"Dream, I'm busy here, can't you see?"_

_"What I see is you're just reading a boring book,"_

_A pout._

_"Yes, I'm busy reading a boring book,"_

_"But I'm bored!"_

_"Hey bored, I'm Nightmare,"_

_“Brotheeeer!”_

_“Ouch! Okay! Okay! Stop hitting me!”_

_“I will if you play with me!”_

_“Hey that’s hurt! What if I read you a fairy-tale? I’m not in the mood to play, the weather’s nice and it's comfortable here,”_

_“Really?! Yay!”_

_A happy smile._

_“…who told you to put your head on my lap?”_

_“Me,”_

_A smug smile._

_“Geez, stop doing what you want,”_

_“You don't seem to mind,”_

_“Yes, you’re lucky I love you so I don’t mind,”_

_A grin._

_“I love you too!”_

_“I know that dummy, stop smiling like a dork,”_

_A soft smile._

_“But I’m happy to know that you love me, I feel like I’m the happiest person in the world!”_

_“You’re also my happiness my small twin,”_

_“Hey I’m not small! You’re just an inch taller!”_

_“But I’m still taller than you,”_

_“One day I’ll be taller than you!”_

_A smile full of confidence._

_“Yeah, yeah, I’ll be waiting for that day to come,”_

* * *

No. In Nightmare’s memory, Dream never once smiled like that. His Dream never smiled like that.

He never realized it until now how much he misses Dream's actual smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My heart is not ready for heavy angst sooo~ let's start with some light angst :))


	7. Confusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream is still confused about the whole thing and the voices just make things worse.

“No,”

To be honest, Dream caught off guard with Nightmare’s answer.

“You’ve never smile like this,”

_~~What did you know?~~ _

Something. Something is burning inside Dream. Inside his soul. Anger. What? Why he feels angry? Why he feels so angry at Nightmare’s words?

“I’m always smiling like this though?”

The guardian stubbornly maintains his smile.

Nightmare frowned. He just realized how easier it was to read Dream’s facial expression rather than his feelings. Dream’s feelings…cannot be defined right now.

Or maybe, was it because this is the first time Nightmare actually paid attention to him?

“You never smile like this, your smile wasn’t _fake_ ,”

_~~What did you even know about me?~~ _

Why?

Why him? Of all people, why **Nightmare**? Why is he the one who can saw through his mask? Or maybe…because **it is** Nightmare that he can’t actually lie to his face?

When they were a kid Dream was a terrible liar after all. Especially in front of Nightmare.

_~~Some things never change and I hate it.~~ _

“Now, now, it’s strange that you’re here in the first place Nightmare, I believe you have something to talk about, you’ve been acting so strange,”

It’s obvious that he tried to change the subject but Nightmare will let it slide. For now.

“Did you forget yesterday’s event?”

Dream’s smile gone instantly as he looked away from his twin.

“…it’s not too late, Nightmare,”

"What?"

“It’s not too late for you to get out of here and pretend that none of this ever happened, we’ll meet again on the battlefield like usual, fighting like usual, just…just act like we usually did, ignore this, nothing happened since yesterday,”

“Are you seriously−”

“Yes, I’ll also pretend that nothing happened, so you can go now−”

“Why can’t you understand?!”

Dream gritted his teeth. The unknown burning fury inside him is almost unbearable.

“I should be the one who’s asking you! Why can’t you understand that I don’t want you to be here?! Stop acting like you actually know everything about me when you know nothing!”

Both of the twins’ eye sockets widened. Even Dream himself can’t believe what he just said. Those words just came out before he had the chance to think about it. And those words actually hurt Nightmare more than he's willing to admit.

But he couldn’t blame Dream for thinking like that. Not after what Nightmare had put him through for centuries. His strange act and sudden change probably confused him a lot. Or maybe, it hurts him rather than make him happy.

“N-Nightmare I−”

“I’m sorry, Dream,”

After saying that, his twin gone from his sight. Dream saw the rare hurt look in his brother’s eye. A chocked sob finally escaped the guardian.

_~~“Awww, look at you, he left you again because of your mistake!”~~ _

“Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!” he screamed.

What Dream didn’t know, is that Nightmare still there. Hiding his presence behind the door and listening to his cries. Nightmare clenched his jacket, right above his chest where his soul supposed to be. It’s hurt. He wanted to go in there. He wanted to comfort his twin. But for obvious reason, he can't. Not yet.

Dream ended up crying himself to sleep. After a long, agonizing moment, he fell asleep again. Nightmare sighed deeply. How long was it? Half an hour? An hour? It felt so long and torturous. Who knows that Dream's cries still have that kind of effect on him?

“Stars, what should I do?”

He didn’t think through about this. Dream probably won’t trust him that easily no matter how Nightmare showed that he meant no harm. He had shattered the trust between them centuries ago. Of course their relationship couldn’t be repaired that easy. What did he expect anyway? Dream’s happy smile he showed when they were a kid? He suddenly felt so stupid.

On the other hand, Nightmare can’t just leave Dream alone. Especially after everything he had known. God knows how long Dream could last before he broke himself completely someday. And Nightmare won’t let it. Not if he can prevent it from happening.

He doesn’t want to feel the same feeling he felt in his last nightmare ( _ouch, the irony_ ). It wasn’t even real but the pure terror felt too real. And that ‘nightmare’ is haunting him whenever he sees Dream’s ‘smile’.

* * *

After Dream fell asleep for a while, Nightmare decided to explore around the area. He hasn’t planned what will he do next but clearing his head sounds good. So currently he has been walking around the forest not too far from Dream’s house. The weather is nice. The sun is high above the sky, shining warmly, and the wind is blowing gently.

Dream was probably overwhelmed with emotion. He should have considered Dream’s feelings in the first place.

“What did I expect? A hug because he saw my change? Stupid me, of course he’s skeptical, I’ve been hunting him down since forever,” he murmured to himself.

Even he never seriously tried to kill him but Dream’s impression of him probably…isn’t the best. Nightmare cursed himself for not realizing it sooner. He is also getting too emotional before and it made him rushed things up.

After a while, he stops under a random tree. It seems like the biggest tree around here. He sat down and lean against it. Nightmare sighed for the umpteenth time.

_‘What am I supposed to do?’_

The gentle wind and the sound of rustling leaves slowly lulled him to sleep.

* * *

_“Brotheeer! Geez, wake uuup!”_

_Nightmare brushed aside his brother’s hand so he could stop pulling his arm._

_“Let me sleeeeep!”_

_“You’ve been sleeping for hours!”_

_“Sleeping is nice,”_

_“You are so lazy! Come ooon! Let’s play tag! You need to move more!” the younger twin is stubbornly pulling Nightmare’s arm._

_Nightmare didn’t even shift a little. Instead, the older pull back and hug him like a bolster._

_“Brother let me gooo!” Dream protested._

_“Ugh, you’re so noisy, you just came back from the village, right? You need to rest, let’s just take a nap with me,”_

_“But I’m neither sleepy nor tired!”_

_“I don’t care, that’s your problem,”_

_Dream puffed out his cheeks. Nightmare peered with his right eye lazily and sighed in defeat._

_“Fine, fine, let’s play tag,” with that, Nightmare flicked Dream’s forehead._

_“You’re it,” and teleported away._

_“Hey! That’s cheating!”_

_Nightmare is laughing mockingly._

_“All is fair in love and war! The moment you refused to make peace with me by taking a nap was the moment you declared war!”_

_"Yay! This is war!"_

_After a few hours, both of them flopped down into the grass right under the tree while panting._

_“Huff, it’s not fair!” Dream suddenly whined._

_“What is it?”_

_“You’re too good at dodging!”_

_“I know I’m that amazing, thank you very much,” Nightmare smiles proudly to make Dream even more irritated than he was._

_“I’m not praising you,”_

_“It sounds like one,”_

_“It was a complaint!”_

_Nightmare simply patted his pouting younger twin’s head to calm him down._

_“I like to sit under the tree and read some books but I admit that was fun, we should do that more often,”_

_Dream’s pout instantly disappears and replaced by a cheerful smile._

_“I told you reading is boring after all!”_

_‘Pffft, he’s so easy to cheer up,’_

_“Hey brother, why are you laughing so suddenly? It’s creepy,”_

_“How dare you call your handsome brother creepy,”_

_“AAAAA STWOP PWINCHING MY CHWEEEK!”_

_“Take that back,”_

_“OWKAY! OWKAY! YOU’RE HWANDSOME!”_

_“That’s better,”_

_Dream rubbed his cheek with a glare directed toward his twin. Nightmare only grinned innocently._

_“Even when you said books are boring you like it when I read them for you,”_

_“But it’s boring when you chose to read them instead of playing with me,”_

_“You’re such a spoiled child,”_

_“I take that as a compliment,” Dream imitated his twin’s proud smile before._

_Nightmare was chuckling before he pulled his twin into his arms, practically suffocating him with his hug._

_“Let me gooo! You stink!” the guardian of positivity tries to pull away to no avail. But he’s laughing nonetheless._

_“Nope, you’re stuck in the hug town!”_

_“This town is stinky!”_

_“Deal with it,”_

_Both of them laugh gleefully._

* * *

Nightmare opened his eyes. The sound of two kids’ laughter somehow echoes in his head. A small smile made its way to Nightmare’s face.

A dream. Or rather, a memory. The nice one, maybe the best. 

_‘It would be wonderful if we could stay like that forever,’_

It has been so long he can feel this calm and relaxed. Especially with the current event happened. He can think more clearly right now.

This time, he has a feeling that he can do it. No matter how long it will take.

* * *

Dream blinked sleepily for a few times. He was having a nice dream. The first nice dream he just had after a long time. Not only that, but it was also one of his fond memories with Nightmare. Just dreaming about it could bring a smile to his face.

His smile dropped when he remembers what he has just done to Nightmare a few hours ago. Strange things just keep coming by a short amount of time and he can’t wrap his head around it. It caused him quite a headache. But after crying he felt a little better. Once he had clear his mind, he immediately regrets what he did back then.

“I shouldn’t say that, he was nothing but kind to me, I should listen to him first, no matter how unstable my emotional state was,” Dream murmured.

He’ll apologize…if he gets the chance. The question is, will he get another chance? He just wasted his opportunity a few hours ago.

It’s silly for him to hope.

_~~“He probably hates you more now,”~~ _

It’s not like Nightmare hating him is a new thing anyway. He used to it.

_~~No, it isn't. It’s still hurt a lot.~~_

His head is so chatty lately it’s annoying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok I'm sorry but the angst hasn't came because my brain refused to torture them with feels-


	8. The Strongest Voice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Out of many different voices inside his head, his own voice is the one Dream feared and hate the most.

_“Uh, hello boss?”_

Nightmare sighed. Horror’s guilty voice gave him a bad feeling.

“What is it?”

_“Do you remember where the fire extinguisher is? I forgot where you put that thing,”_

“…”

“…”

“Who the fuck burned the kitchen?”

_“Cross, Dust, and Killer did. I went shopping this afternoon and left them for an hour. When I arrived the fire wasn’t that big before−”_

_“BEFORE KILLER SPLASHED THE FIRE WITH A DAMN WATER!”_ Dust sounds panicked and pissed at the same time.

 _“I DON’T KNOW THAT THE FIRE WILL GET BIGGER OKAY?!”_ Killer protested.

 _“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA−”_ Cross is screaming in the background.

“I left you guys, for one. Fucking. Day,”

Silence.

_“…sorry,”_

“I put the fire extinguisher at…”

The skeleton thinks for a few seconds.

“You know what? I’ll go back so I can smack your head one by one, except Horror,”

Before one of them could protest, Nightmare hung up and disappeared into the ground. The next time he opened his eyes, he reappeared outside his castle. Even from outside, he can see a concerning smoke coming from one of his windows.

_‘Why can’t I have a quiet day for once?’_

The moment he slammed the main door of his castle, smoke came out from it. He coughed a little.

_‘Ah, the headache whenever they do something stupid is coming,’_

“BOYS!”

* * *

Nightmare is staring at the three younger skeletons that bow their head in shame with an unimpressed stare while also searching for any injury on his boys. He sighed in relief when he didn’t find any. Except for the black stain on their faces and clothes, they look completely fine. While Horror is watching from the sideline with an amused smirk.

“I banned you guys from the kitchen months ago,” Nightmare crossed his arms with an annoyed look on his face.

“Well, we were watching a video on how to make a fluffy pancake,” Cross started.

“It looked easy so we were trying to make it ourselves since Horror went to shopping,” Killer added.

“But the fire is too big it burned the pancake when we cook it,” Dust ended.

“…for fuck’s sake, give me a break,”

“We’re sorry,”

With his tentacle, Nightmare smacks their head. A little playfully though.

“Clean up the mess, if you want to cook again in the future wait for Horror to watch over you, are we clear?”

“Yes daaad,” the three of them said in unison.

They ran away to the kitchen before Nightmare could scold them again. The guardian shook his head.

“Aw, dad is stressed,” Horror laughed.

“Shut up Horror,”

“Where were you last night?”

For a moment, Nightmare considers telling his comrade. But…

“I have important things that I can’t leave, and I don’t think it’s something I could tell other people,”

“Let me guess, was it about your brother?”

“Am I that obvious?”

“You already said you want to check on something in our last battle, usually you fought your brother at the same field, but yesterday you separate yourself and your brother from us, of course we noticed what, or more precisely, who you wanted to check,”

“If the situation forces it, maybe I’ll tell you guys,” he stopped and whispers. “I hope I don’t need to,”

Horror will pretend that he didn’t hear Nightmare’s whisper.

* * *

Dream feels someone left his universe and he finally could sigh in relief. At least if Nightmare is in a different universe, it won't be that easy for him to feel his...negative emotions. His control is worsened lately and he's not sure he can hide it if they're in the same universe.

Anyway. It can’t be helped that he’s not ready to face his brother again. He wanted to apologize, yes. But he doesn’t want to do it now…or anytime too soon.

_‘Will Nightmare forgive me though?’_

_~~“You hurt him,”~~ _

_~~“You hurt him **again** ,”~~ _

_~~“Was it not enough? Why are you always hurting him?”~~ _

_~~“No wonder he left you,”~~ _

_~~“You can’t just stop making him suffer, didn’t you?”~~ _

_~~“You made him suffer right~? There’s no way he will care about you now! AHAHAHAHAHA−”~~ _

His head is ringing. Again. Those laughs are loud. So damn loud. Dream let out a chocked laugh.

_‘He won’t forgive me for sure, I threw away the only chance I had, why would he forgive me anyway? All I did is hurting him and made him suffer, just like I did in the past,’_

_~~“Heh, what a fool,”~~ _

_~~“What a heartless bastard,”~~ _

Dream harshly rip his bandages, resulting in opening some wounds. But those whispers in his head became louder instead. The voice changed. And it's not just a random voice. It’s **his** own voice.

_~~It’s not enough, this scar isn’t enough.~~ _

The guardian looks at his arms ~~with many red lines~~ with a terrified look. Out of all voices, Dream hates his own voice the most.

Because deep down he knew, that his voice is not just an ordinary voice.

**_It’s his forbidden desire that he desperately keep hidden for the sake of his remaining sanity._ **

_~~I want to die.~~ _

One of his hands is clenching his head while the other hand is searching for a sharp object on his nightstand. He couldn’t find his knife. He remembers that he put it on the nightstand yesterday.

_~~My scars will never be enough.~~ _

Dream almost fall when he got up from his bed but he managed to stand by holding onto the nightstand. He opened the drawer and throw out random things inside it. He still couldn’t find it.

_‘Come on! Knife! Scissors! Anything! Please, please, please I need it to stop!’_

_~~I want to die.~~ _

_~~I can’t take this anymore.~~ _

“STOP IT!”

The guardian hit the closest thing from him. A mirror on the wall. It shattered into pieces. Blood is flowing from his injured hand. The pain eased him a little but his voice inside his head haven’t disappeared.

_~~I want to end this all.~~ _

_~~What’s the point of living?~~ _

_~~It’s pointless.~~ _

_~~I couldn’t even save my own family. Let alone other people.~~ _

_~~I want to die.~~ _

_~~Dying is a good thing, isn’t it?~~ _

Dream’s hand suddenly stopped searching for anything to ‘stop’ his own voice.

_~~If I die, maybe the pain will stop.~~ _

Dream’s own voice is the most terrifying out of many voices. Even much more terrifying than Nightmare’s.

_~~If I die, I’ll stop being a nuisance.~~ _

Because the longer it spoke, the less sanity he has. ~~~~

_~~If I die, he’s going to be happy.~~ _

The longer it spoke…

_~~Nightmare won’t have to suffer again right, me?~~ _

The more it sounded makes sense for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahdgdjkdkdhskdkhf sorry it was short qwq
> 
> Anyway. This is Dream in this fic. Basically. https://youtu.be/UynI7mmITjE
> 
> I watched this countless time and I'm sad. Let's feel sadness together.


	9. Help

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nightmare went to the only place where someone could help him right now.

_‘I shouldn't go back to my castle,’_

_‘I shouldn't leave him alone,’_

_‘Why are you so fucking stupid Nightmare?! Where's your brilliant head when you need it?!’_

Sci’s lab door suddenly being slammed. The guardian of negativity is standing there, breathing heavily. His arms are carrying his limp, bloody twin. Both of Dream’s arms are bleeding and have some ripped red bandages. His feet are also bleeding and have some cuts on them. Sci rubbed his glasses a few times to make sure he’s not mistaken.

 _'Am I dreaming right now? Or did I lost that much sleep that I start to have hallucinations?'_ the scientist rubbed one of his eye sockets.

"What are you waiting for?! You can ask me anything in return after this but please save him!"

Welp. His curiosity can wait. The young skeleton’s face turned serious.

“Bring him to the operation room, you can stay outside and wait,”

* * *

Nightmare doesn’t know how long time has passed but it felt so long. He’s pacing back and forth anxiously in front of the operation door.

_‘Shit, I shouldn’t have left him, why am I suddenly that stupid? His condition is far from stable, why the hell I left him because of a fucking burned kitchen?! I can just repair it but if Dream loses his life…’_

Nightmare stopped his train of thought.

No. He didn’t want to think about something like that. Dream will be fine. No. _He_ _must be fine._ Definitely.

Or so he convinced himself.

The guardian shuddered at the memory of Dream lying limply on the bathroom floor _~~unmoving and looked lifeless~~_. Nightmare glares at the operation door in front of him as if that door would open if he glares long enough.

_‘What took him so long? Was his condition that bad? Can Dream be saved?’_

_‘Sci knows what he’s doing, he’s at the safe hand, he will be okay,’_

_‘He’ll certainly be fine. He’s strong after all,’_

_‘Something like overdose won’t kill him,’_

_‘…it won’t…right?’_

_‘It’s funny how I of all people trying so hard to think positive,’_ a chocked laugh escaped his mouth.

After a long, agonizing moment, the operation door finally open and Sci came out of the room with a calm expression. Nightmare took that as good news but he needs explanation.

“What took you so long?!” Nightmare snapped.

Sci stares at him strangely. “Nightmare, I just took 30 minutes in there, was it ‘that’ long for you?”

“Yes, it felt so damn long! Is he okay? How’s his condition? What happened to him?”

“He’s okay, his condition is stable, I already treated his wounds, mostly. He’ll wake up around six until eight hours at most, I can’t tell you what happened to him though,"

“What?! Why?!”

“You knew that I always keep my client’s secret no matter what happened, I won’t tell a single soul unless my client allowed me to do that, if you want to know you can ask him by yourself,”

It’s hopeless to gain information from him. Nightmare sighed harshly but didn’t push any further. He knew from personal experience that it’s impossible to make Sci talk. The younger skeleton stared at Nightmare sympathetically. This is the first time he has seen the guardian of negativity looks so lost and frustrated.

He doesn’t know what happened between the brothers but Nightmare probably isn’t acting like his usual calm, collected self. And from what he knew, Nightmare hates Dream. But today he just saw something unbelievable and he has some guesses about what happened. After a short uncomfortable silence, Sci broke the silence.

“Do you want coffee?”

“…that would be nice,”

* * *

Nightmare is sitting on the couch, a mug of coffee in his hand. He sighed a little after drinking the black coffee. The owner of the room is also sitting beside him, sipping his coffee.

“Have you calmed down yet?”

“Kind of,”

Again, a silence.

“Can I know what happened?”

Sci expect Nightmare say something like, “You didn’t tell me what happened so why should I tell you?” but instead Nightmare answered, “Sure,”

The scientist quickly controlled his surprised expression and ready to listen.

“I just went to my castle to take care of something and…”

* * *

_After everything settled down, Nightmare went back to Dream’s house. He also didn’t forget to hide his presence before teleporting there. He walks to his brother’s room window. Dream is nowhere in sight._

_‘He’s already awake huh,’ the guardian thought._

_Nightmare can’t feel his twin’s presence. It seems he already keeps his guard up again._

_‘Or maybe he’s not home in the first place?’_

_Just when Nightmare thought about it, a sound of something shattered made an alarm rang in his head. He didn’t think twice before teleporting inside. The living room is empty, so is the kitchen. Dream’s room is empty so it’s impossible for him to be there. The remaining rooms are the bathroom and 'that' mysterious room. The former is most likely so Nightmare teleported there._

_The moment he arrived, the guardian suddenly can’t move his body. He just…froze._

_There, at the corner of the bathroom, his twin sat, leaning against the wall. His eye sockets shut. His bandages ripped. His wounds opened, still bleeding. The bathroom that still has broken shards scattered around the floor is now ‘decorated’ with new red footprints. He shifted his gaze to the opened first aid kit and found the bottle with the ‘antidepressant’ label._

_That means…those white pills that scattered around the guardian of positivity are…_

_The thought of what his brother tried to do filled him with dread. He remembered Sci’s prohibition note about Dream taking more than one sleeping pill._

_“Did he try…to overdose?” he whispered to himself in a tone of disbelief._

_Complicated emotions swirling inside him. Mostly negative, probably._

_‘Why?’_

_‘Why the hell did he do that?’_

_'Was it because of me?'_

_‘SNAP OUT OF IT! IT'S NOT THE TIME TO THINK SOMETHING NEGATIVE! WILL YOU JUST STAND THERE AND LETTING HIM DIE?!’ the last sane part of him screamed._

_That’s when Nightmare realized that he was only wasting time. He immediately carries his brother and went to the only place he can think._

* * *

“And you already saw the rest by yourself,” Nightmare drank his coffee to calm himself. The sense of dread he felt was coming again when he recounted that moment. He shuddered a little.

The scientist hummed in understanding. From what Nightmare told him, it seems he knew about Dream’s…'problem'.

“…well, there’s one thing I can tell you about his condition right now,”

At Sci’s words, Nightmare’s expression turned hopeful. Sci never expected to see that kind of expression on Nightmare of all people. Today was full of surprises indeed.

“He didn’t overdose, he just took one pill around an hour ago, though, I don’t know the reason why he took his sleeping pill at the bathroom of all place, from what he told me he usually took it when he’s on his bed because he didn’t want to wake up with a bruise from hitting something in his sleep,”

Nightmare sighed in relief. “Thanks for telling me this Sci, that’s good to hear,”

Sci frowns. “…I thought you hate him?”

“Heh, yeah, I thought so too,”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp. Guess I changed this story from its former plot a lot more than I intended. I hope you guys like it? ^^"


	10. 'Interrogation'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nightmare wanted to know about Dream's condition but getting 'interrogated' instead.

“Sci, can I see my brother now?”

“He’s probably still sleeping though,”

“You already told me that,” Nightmare replied slightly irritated.

“I mean, I thought you want to talk with him?”

“…not yet. I’ll just stay beside him in case something bad happens in his dreamland,”

“Oh? Do you have similar power as him?” Sci asked with an interested tone.

“Not quite, it works like my usual power to absorb negative feelings,”

The scientist nodded and write that down on his note.

“So? Can I?” Nightmare repeated his question.

“Sure. His bed is at the very end of that room,”

Without another word, Nightmare walks to the room Sci pointed at. But he stops when he’s about to open the door.

“Thanks for saving him…and also for the coffee,”

After he muttered that, the guardian entered the room. Sci couldn’t help but smile amusedly.

“You are very welcome,”

* * *

After some hours working on his research(es), Sci stretched his stiff body. He reached for his coffee mug and drink it all.

_‘I wonder how’s their condition right now,’_

With that, Sci teleported to the room where the twins currently staying. Nightmare is sitting on the chair beside the bed where his brother currently sleeping. His expression is unreadable. It’s not sad, yet not happy either. Sci walked closer to Nightmare, standing next to him.

“Is he okay?”

“So far? Yes. He’s sleeping soundly,”

Somehow Sci could ‘hear’ a smile from the older skeleton.

“Hey, is there some questions you can answer about Dream?”

Nightmare sounds unsure and hesitant. Sci seems to consider it for a moment. Nightmare is waiting for the answer a little anxiously. If Sci refuse to his request, he honestly doesn’t know how to know more about Dream’s condition. Asking Dream himself is a stupid move (for now). But he doesn’t know who to ask anymore.

_‘If I gave him some information…maybe it will help Dream’s condition instead?’_

The scientist would most likely refuse but unexpectedly, Sci nodded.

“As long as it’s not too personal I might answer it, and in one condition,”

Nightmare’s expression is a mix of shock and relief but he’s quick to hide it with a neutral expression. He didn’t want Sci to refuse, but he didn’t actually expect him to accept that easily either.

“Okay. What’s the condition?”

“You must answer when I ask you back,”

“I already said that I will do anything you want. Answering your question is easy,”

“You’re just as difficult as your brother in answering people’s questions and great at dodging it. Especially about your feelings,” Sci rolled his eyes.

“Welp, you’re not wrong,” Nightmare shrugged.

He doesn’t know why but he really wanted to hit Nightmare’s flat expression just now.

“Okay enough talking nonsense, how much did you know about Dream’s condition?” Nightmare asked to the point. Their expression turned serious in second.

“It’s very rare for him to talk about himself, especially about his feelings,” Sci paused, a grim smile on his smile. “He only came to find me if he ran out of medicine, but I knew quite a lot about his current condition,”

The other’s expression turned just as grim as the scientist.

“How long did you know about it?”

“I didn’t exactly remember when. One day Ink dragged him here by force and ordered me to make sleeping pills for Dream. He looks very sleep deprived back then. You know, since normal medicine won’t work on you guardians,”

Nightmare took a note in his head to ask the guardian of AUs if the 

“I saw your note about…it was…on the label at the sleeping pills,”

Sci's expression turned even darker.

“Heh, no wonder you thought that he was being overdosed before. If you need confirmation, yes, he had taken more than one before. It didn’t actually kill him instantly. If you notice there was a moment when Dream didn’t ‘work’ for more than 2 weeks or something,”

The guardian thought about it for a while before nodded.

“Was it around 4 months ago?”

“Yes, around that. The medicine is not dangerous if you only took one but if you took two or more, it’ll make you sleep longer and mess up your body system slowly but surely. Especially when you took it constantly which could lead someone to death. He didn’t actually overdose, he said he didn’t know it could lead to…it. At least that was what he made me believe him,”

Nightmare tensed.

_ At least that was what he made me believe him. _

“Unexpected right? Your brother, I mean. I never imagined that he of all people…” Sci stopped. It seems he can’t find the right words but Nightmare understands what’s the scientist meant.

"Judging from your attitude, you just know about it recently, aren’t you?”

“…yeah,”

“I thought you're the first person that knew about this. You’re the guardian of negativity after all, you should have sensed his negative emotions. I thought you already knew about it from the start but chose to ignore it,”

“I **_should have_** , but I couldn’t. He can control his emotions, more precisely manipulate his own emotions. I felt stupid for just realizing it recently,”

He paused. His expression turned bitter.

“I know I am the bad guy of the universe but I have my reason Sci. Being the 'bad guy' doesn’t mean I'm heartless. To be honest, I was, for one reason or another. Like I said before, I thought I hate him all this time when actually I just… forgot ‘how’ to love him. And fate decided to slap me right on the face to make me realize that I still care about him like...a lot,”

“And how exactly did you know about this? What makes you suddenly change your mind and pay attention to him? What started all of your sudden change?”

“One at the time Sci,”

“Sorry, what started it?”

The guardian couldn’t help but shudder at the ‘nightmare’ that haunted the back of his mind lately.

“I…had a nightmare. Pretty ironic, I know. It’s not like that was the first time I had it but…the 'nightmare' I had that time seemed too real,”

“What did you see?”

“I saw Dream jumped off a cliff,”

“…”

The young Sans didn’t know how to respond that.

“It’s not like I wanted to have that nightmare but…if I had that nightmare sooner, I might realize what has been happening. I know I’m not the best brother…I’m probably the worst but…it’s not like I actually hate him nor I want him to actually dead and suffering this much. It’s funny hearing this from me who makes him suffer in the first place heh,” Nightmare chuckled.

“At least you’re not too late,”

“…what do you mean?”

“Hey, I can’t believe I'm saying this to you of all people but… cheer up okay? He can still be saved, he will be okay, you both will be okay, I'm sure of it,”

“Why are you so sure?”

“No reason in particular,” Sci paused. “Even the chance for him to ‘heal’ may low, it doesn’t mean that it’s entirely impossible. It’ll take a lot of time for sure, but with his family staying by his side, it might help him to heal faster. At least that’s what I think,”

Nightmare’s eye now fixed on his sleeping twin. His expression is peaceful and…alive.

It’s surprisingly reassuring hearing that they’ll be okay from other people.

“I’ll return to my lab. If something happens to Dream don’t hesitate to call me,”

“I will,”

After Sci left the room, Nightmare holds his brother’s uninjured hand and close his eye.

* * *

Sci entered the operation room to check the twins’ again. The scientist stunned. He didn’t expect to see such a soothing sight. The sight of their intertwined fingers brought a smile to the scientist’s face. Dream is still sleeping while Nightmare also asleep, leaning against the wall with one hand holding his twin’s hand. Usually, when Dream was under the sleeping pill’s effect, he never showed any expression. But right now, he has a very peaceful expression on his face. His older twin also has a similar expression.

What a rare sight. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder why I got a lot of ideas back when I had so many assignments from my class yet struggle to write on holiday? Seriously? ;-;
> 
> Sorry for the wait. I hope you enjoy this chapter :D


	11. The Reason

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sci is both concerned and curious.

It’s either fortunately or unfortunately that Ink dragged him to Sci a few years ago. That day the guardian of positivity was so stubborn. He refused to sleep or at least rest. More precisely he just… couldn’t sleep. Isn’t that better to use his time to work rather than laying down on his bed without doing anything?

He feels okay though. But his body clearly isn’t. Tired of his stubbornness, Ink dragged him by force to Labtale. Ink knew that normal medicine won’t work on them since he’s being one of the guardians himself after all.

Unfortunately, his body is indeed resting. ~~His mind isn’t~~. Sci made those sleeping pills with as few side effects as possible but something like an unusual dream, headache, and a little nausea is inevitable. If he’s lucky enough, he won’t dream about anything. If he’s unlucky though… he couldn’t escape the ‘unusual dream’ before the medicine’s effect run out. The good thing is, he feels better after that. His body feels lighter, and he can do his job better than before. So he continues to take it.

He continues to ignore Sci’s warning about that medicine. He said it could affect his mental health. That time he didn't know about Dream's 'main problem' after all.

Well, it’s not like I have a good mental state in the first place, he thought that time as he laughed at himself.

On the other hand, Sci knows about how bad his insomnia is. It’s either Sci makes those medicines, or the guardian won’t sleep at all. Sci already thought it was a bad idea for him to make it, but Dream _needs_ it. So all he can do is continue to develop the sleeping pills so it won’t have too many side effects. Dream can’t thank the scientist enough.

* * *

The white ceiling is familiar. Well, he had spent his time under this ceiling a few months ago. It’s one of Sci's room. If he remembered correctly this is the operation room.

When he opened his eyes, Dream feels so…calm and content. Like his stress and fatigue just disappeared after that sleep. He didn't have a dream either! He looks at his hand. It’s…strangely warm. Like someone had been holding it. But maybe it’s just his imagination, right? Sci doesn’t have that much free time to do that and he has no reason to do that either.

“You’re awake,”

Dream almost jumped from the familiar voice.

“…hi Sci. It seems I caused you trouble again,” the guardian smiles uncomfortably.

Sci rolled his eye lights but smiling back nonetheless. “Don’t mind it geez. At least I’ve gotten to watch a ‘good show’,”

…maybe smirking is more precise. Dream, for one reason or another, didn't want to ask about what he meant by 'good show' so the guardian changes the subject.

“Can I ask you how did I end up here?”

“Well, isn’t that obvious?”

Dream looks confused.

“Did someone bring me here? Who?”

Well, Nightmare never said anything about not telling Dream so…

“It was Nightmare,”

“…you’re lying,”

“I know you will know whether I was lying or not,”

“But it was impossible!”

“Dream, I don’t even know how to open a portal across the universe. Aren’t you being too denial? I know that you know I wasn’t lying,”

“He only needs something for me. He didn’t do all of this because he cares about me or anything. That’s it,” Dream said sternly.

For some reason, Sci feels a little angry. He saw how panic Nightmare was. He saw how relieved Nightmare was when he told him that Dream is okay. He saw that soft stare Nightmare used when he was looking at his brother when he thought Sci wasn’t looking. But Sci can’t blame Dream either. With how Nightmare treated him for years, it’s probably hard for Dream to believe this. No matter how obvious Nightmare acted.

“Sorry,” Dream suddenly said while avoiding the younger’s stare.

He probably sensed Sci’s anger.

“Dream, I’m not angry at you, I just…”

“Just…what?”

“Nightmare slammed my door,”

“He what−”

“He begged me to save his brother no matter what,”

“Sci−”

“I never saw the almighty lord of darkness looked so weak in front of his unconscious brother,”

“…”

“For the first time I saw him smiling relievedly when I told him his brother is okay, he even stayed by his brother’s side for a while to make sure he’s okay,”

“He’s not… he didn’t… he hates me,”

“Why are you so stubborn?”

“Because all of this is confusing! I don’t understand!”

“About what, exactly?”

“About which one was a hallucination and which one was real!”

Sci fell silent for a second before asking.

“When was the last time you take your antidepressant?”

“U-um, it was, maybe, t-three weeks ago?”

Sci took a deep breath to calm himself down.

“I was about to take it today okay?!”

“Really?” Sci deadpanned.

“Yes! The voices and the hallucinations worsened lately so I just about to took it today but I took the wrong medicine since I was too panicked!”

Everything suddenly clicked into place.

“So…you took a sleeping pill instead of the antidepressant?”

“Yes,”

“And you fell asleep at your bathroom?”

“…yes,”

“…I want to laugh but now is not the right time to do that,” Sci muttered.

“I would laugh if I were you,” Dream chuckled at his own stupidity.

Sci also laughed a little before he’s back in asking his ‘patient's’ condition, changing the subject of their real conversation for a while.

“How are you feeling right now?”

“I feel a lot better, though, I heard voices when I was sleeping,”

“Were you dreaming about something? What did you hear?”

“No, I didn’t. I only saw black but for once I didn’t hear those… malicious voices like usual, I heard yours and Nightmare’s voice instead,” he paused. “He said he never hates me, funny isn’t it?”

“He did say that,”

“Funny right? He−wait. He what?!”

“He was staying for a while, fell asleep when doing so. Not too long before you woke up, he left without reason. We talked quite a lot when you were sleeping. He’s surprisingly docile and answered anything I asked since he promised me. He even talked about his feelings too and since he said it when you were sleeping, I believe he’s telling the truth,”

“…impossible,”

“He promised me that he will do anything to save you, so I just need him to answer some questions honestly,”

“He was lying!”

“I can’t sense someone’s feeling like you two but I know when someone is being sincere,”

“But he doesn’t have any reason to care for me!”

 _‘Here we go again,’_ the scientist sighed.

Dream is too hard on himself. Sci is very, very concerned about that but it’s not like he could do anything. He tried to change Dream’s mindset about that little by little but to no avail. He wonders what made him like that. He didn’t actually know much about the Dreamtale brothers, but he at least knew a little. After all, he prefers information and knowledge rather than gold coins for his services. If it’s not too private, Dream and Nightmare will answer his question about their past.

“Dream, you two should talk. There are many things you two have to talk about, and maybe, talking to him will help you!”

“There’s no guarantee that will help me,”

“And there’s no guarantee that won’t help you either,”

“I don’t want to,”

“Dream listen−”

“No! I don’t want to talk to him! I’m not ready!”

“Why? Why are you not ready? When will you ready?”

“I… I was… nevermind,”

_‘Ugh, I was so close to making him tell his reason. Sorry Dream, but I need to do this,’_

“You were what? Were you scared? Were you guilty?” Sci’s tone is taunting. Dream can feel something inside him burning with… probably something not good.

“Why don’t you answer me?

And he burst out before he knows it.

“I can’t Sci, I fucking can’t damn it! I wanted to talk to him too but I can’t! I can’t bring myself to look at him in the eye! I can’t−Sci I can’t! Every time I look at him reminds me of my failure in protecting him! It’s my fault he became like that−it’s my fault t-that I−gosh Sci it’s all my fault he’s in a lot of pain−I failed−I couldn’t−I shouldn’t have−”

Sci holds Dream’s shoulders firmly, looking him in the eye. He needs the guardian to stop before he gets into a panic attack.

“Dream stop it. That's enough,” Sci told him sternly.

And he did. He’s still breathing rapidly but he stopped talking.

“Now, control your breath,” now he said it with a softer tone.

Fortunately, Dream hasn’t gone into a full panic attack so it’s easier for him to control his rapid breath. After some minutes Sci released the guardian from his hold. Dream took a deep breath and smile weakly.

“Thanks,”

“Don’t mention it. Sorry for taunting you but…I don’t know how to make you talk except that way,” the scientist smiles back guiltily.

“It’s… fine, I−”

_‘No. Stop it Dream. Don’t feel like that. You will only be a bother. No. You are not feeling better by talking about your feelings to people. It’s. Not!’_

Dream shakes his head.

“What is it?”

“Nothing,” the guardian only smiles.

Sci didn't push any further. It’s a little strange though. Sci didn’t usually force someone to talk, so why before…?

“Dream, I’m so, so sorry for this,” Sci suddenly apologizing again.

Dream frowned. He has a bad feeling. A very, very bad feeling.

“Sorry for what?”

“Nightmare! You can come in right now! I know you’re outside!”

And that’s when Dream stiffened. His mind is blank for a while. Sci saw the chance and put a silver bracelet on the guardian’s wrist without the guardian knowing it. The door opened, and Nightmare entered with a faint sad expression. He tried to keep his expression neutral but failed.

Dream snapped his finger, but nothing happened. He can’t teleport.

_‘What’s happening?!’_

“I’ll remove the magic canceller bracelet after you both done talking. I’ll leave you for now,”

There’s great guilt coming from Sci as he disappeared behind the closed door, leaving the brothers alone. There's a faint click of the door being locked. Dream has nowhere to escape.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. I love it when I suddenly being hit by inspiration and write a lot of words for one chapter XD
> 
> One more thing! If you have something to ask about how I write someone's character (since I often wrote the AUs' trait different from the canon and very, very out of character), feel free to ask me! Like, I talked about Ink's character in my perspective with Mirai in comment section since I didn't explicitly talk about someone's trait in my story. That's fun btw XD
> 
> Oh, and for PrincessJayBird, I'm sorry but the chaos will start in the next chapter ;)
> 
> Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it! ^^


	12. Heart to Heart Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream is not ready to talk, but at least he's ready to listen. And that's good enough for Nightmare.

There’s a heavy silence in the air. Dream is sitting still on his bed, lying against the headboard. While Nightmare is sitting on the chair beside the bed. How long it has been? 5 minutes? 15? 30? Maybe an hour? Nightmare didn’t actually count how much time has passed. It felt so long and suffocating. Never once in his life Nightmare feels this tense.

But Sci gave him a chance. Maybe this is his only chance in a lifetime. The only chance he could have. The only chance to save his brother. He can’t afford to mess this up.

And finally, Nightmare opened his mouth.

"Hey... Brother,"

When was the last time... Nightmare called him 'brother' without any mocking tone again? It sounds... strange to hear.

 _'You didn't even deserve to be his brother anymore,'_ said the voice. Dream ignored it. Or at least, tried to.

"U-um, hey broth-I-I mean... Nightmare,"

For the first time, Nightmare felt bitter to hear his own name coming from Dream. Now Nightmare thinks about it, when did Dream stop calling him brother? And why it hurts him more than he thought?

"How… are you?"

"I'm… fine, I guess?”

"…good,"

Dammit. Nightmare cursed himself. He's 'usually' a smooth-talker. But why couldn't he do it now of all time?

"We… haven't finished our last conversation,"

Dream's body stiffened ever so slightly.

_‘Great. Great Nightmare. Just great. You scared him. I wanted to bury myself,’_

"…do we really have to? Can't you just… forget about all of this?"

"Yes and no," Nightmare answered without hesitation.

"W-what if I don't… want to?" the younger asked. He sounds unsure and scared.

"Then can you just… please listen to me? After that, you can decide whether to talk to me or not. Is that okay with you?"

Dream hesitated. He still refused to look at him, but finally gave him a hesitant nod as an answer. Nightmare took a deep breath to prepare himself even he didn’t actually prepare anything.

He just wanted Dream to understand how much he cares about him. That’s all.

"There are… so many misunderstandings between us like... a lot. If I just talk to you from the start, maybe everything would be... better,” Nightmare inwardly winced at how awkward he sounded, but he continues.

"You know, Dream? You're strong. Really, really strong. You're one of a few people who able to keep up with me in battle, not going to mention you only ate one golden apple. No matter what happened, you always came back to your feet. Perfectly okay, smiling like the happiest person in the world, fighting for what you believe in, helping a lot of people even you didn’t know them," Nightmare paused, a bitter smile made its way to his face.

“But recently I just realized that you’re far stronger than I thought,”

Dream blinked a few times and slowly facing his twin with a confused look. Nightmare’s smile turned soft, and Dream stunned at his smile. In a split second, he saw the image of Nightmare’s soft smile from those long time ago.

“You’re trying so hard to keep moving forward, despite the past that has been holding you down. You’re still smiling despite so many bad things that have been happened to you. You’re having a ‘mission’ to make other people happy yet you’re unable to be happy. You’re hiding all of your pain and sadness with a beautiful smile and pretty lies too well that even I was fooled for a very long time,”

Nightmare is moving so carefully to hold Dream’s hand, caressing it gently.

“You’re a very lovable person Dream. You are kind, forgiving, cheerful, charismatic, confident, determined, easy-going, and much, much more than that. I see you have a lot of friends like Blue, Ink, Outer, Sci, even those Fell Sanses, not going to mention people that adore you. You will be okay despite our bitter past, you will be okay no matter where you go, or so I thought… until I realized a lot of changes from you. You’ve changed a lot, and I just realized it lately,”

“I didn’t realize when you lost your genuine smile until I saw your fake smile. I didn’t realize when you lost your happy laugh until I heard your empty laugh. I didn’t realize how long you have been hurting until I saw your scars. And I just realized how precious you are to me when I’m this close from losing you,”

Dream’s undetected feelings started leaking. Incomprehension and guilt.

“H-how? How come you feel like this about me? I’m the reason for your suffering in the first place,”

“No, you’re not. I was blinded by jealousy and envy that I couldn’t see how much you care for me. I wanted to be loved like you that I made a stupid mistake for the sake of those imbeciles that did nothing but brought misery to us. I couldn’t think clearly because I was scared to be hurt and ate those apples. You shouldn't blame yourself for my decision because my mistakes and my sins are mine to bear alone,”

“But it’s all my fault! I was oblivious, stupid, and pathetic! If I just pay more attention to you, not them−I should've stayed by your side! You’re the only family I have but I let you down!"

“Stop saying those bad things about yourself. I know you were trying. You always asked me what’s wrong, you tried to always be there for me no matter how busy you were,”

“But I didn’t do anything help you even though I could have done that,”

“Because you don’t know about what actually happened. I pushed you away because I didn’t want you to worried about me. I don’t… I don’t want them to hurt you too. I want to protect you at that time, but we were both only a child with a childish mindset. We both made some mistakes without knowing the consequences,”

“I… didn’t actually regret _everything_. After all, if I didn’t eat those apples, I wouldn’t meet Horror, Killer, Dust, Error, and Cross, but I _have_ some regrets, especially after I know how you actually feel for years. If I had known that everything would turn out like this, I would never leave you, or at least… I should have talked to you much, much sooner before it turned out for the worst. To be honest I… I’m happy with my current life. I have a new family who accepted me for who I am but… it will never be the same without my childish little brother pestering me like in the past,”

Nightmare’s hold on Dream’s hand tightened, his expression stern but fond at the same time.

“Dream, you deserve to be freed from our dark past, you deserve to be happy, to be loved,”

No matter how much his heart refused to believe Nightmare’s words, he can’t just ignore his brother’s sincerity. On the other hand, he couldn’t help but feel confused. Why? Why is Nightmare being so stubborn? Why doesn’t Nightmare want him to blame himself? Nightmare has every right to be angry! To blame him! To hate him! But why didn’t he do that?! He doesn’t understand. He can’t understand!

Tears of anger are running down Dream’s cheeks before he could prevent it.

“I don't deserve to be happy can't you see that?! Yes, you have done some mistakes but everything that has been happened to you wouldn't happen in the first place if I wasn't so fucking stupid! I-it was obvious! I shouldn't have just brushed it off, believing what you said without thinking twice! You got hurt because of my obliviousness! Y-you became like this because of m-me! Y-you've been hurt a lot because of me! I don’t deserve to be happy! I don’t deserve to be loved! Why did you still care about me?! I don't understand! I can't understand!”

Nightmare immediately stands and bring his brother into his warm embrace.

“Take your time, you don’t have to understand now. We have a lot of time ahead us to understand each other from now on so… please, don’t you ever, ever think again to end this all. I will do anything to make you stay because I always care about you damn it! I know I didn’t show it for a very long time but I always care about you! From then, now, and so on, I will never stop caring about you. I… I’m not ready to lose you. I’m not ready to let go, nor will I ever be,” the older guardian tightened his hug. His body is shaking and Dream feels his right shoulder damp.

Dream’s mind is a little slow at processing all of this information. But when all of that sink in, he feels… complicated. Should he feel sad? Should he feel happy? Is it normal to feel both at the same time? _~~Does he really deserve to be happy?~~_

The younger guardian is crying even harder when every word Nightmare has said, keep replaying in his head and blocking the usual malicious voices in the back of his mind.

_“You’re strong,”_

_“You’re a very lovable person Dream,"_

_"You are kind, forgiving, cheerful, charismatic, confident, determined, easy-going, and much, much more than that,"_

_“You shouldn't blame yourself for my decision,”_

_“Stop saying those bad things about yourself,”_

_“It will never be the same without my childish little brother pestering me like in the past,”_

_“Dream, you deserve to be freed from our dark past, you deserve to be happy, to be loved,”_

_“I always care about you damn it! I know I didn’t show it for a very long time but I always care about you! From then, now, and so on, I will never stop caring about you,”_

_“I’m not ready to lose you. I’m not ready to let go, nor will I ever be,”_

Nightmare already poured his heart out and yet… he’s not quite ready to do the same. Should he reply now? What should he say?

Wait. No. What does _he_ _want_ to say the most?

Nightmare expected his brother not to hug back, or worse, push him away. But with his shaking arms, Dream reached Nightmare’s back, hugging back just as tight. The guardian of positivity can feel happiness from his twin the moment his arms circling around him.

“Hiks, Night-b-brother I−hik−miss y-you a lot,”

“Yeah, me too Dreamy, me too,” Nightmare replied with a choked voice.

Nightmare often called him with that nickname in their childhood. He thought that nickname is cute, just like his little brother. Nightmare’s embrace is still the same, no matter how much centuries have passed, just as warm and comforting.

Dream feels like he’s back into the past. But this time, it feels much, much better. It feels… real.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaand there we go! I really enjoyed writing this story lately! No, I didn't abandon my other fic. Maybe after some editing, I'll post a new chapter each fic in the near future ~~that, if I didn't have a change of heart and rewrite the whole chapter again qwq~~
> 
> I was almost crying while writing this chapter ngl. My heart is weak for soft nootmare ;-;  
> And Dreamy baby finally accepted that everything is real~ Now we just have to wait for him to open his heart to other people UwU  
> ...I hope their relationship process isn't too rushed? Sorry if it was. Thanks for reading~


	13. Complicated Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes life is kind to them. But most of the time? It wasn't.

_‘When was the last time I cried this much?’_ the guardian of negativity wondered himself.

They didn’t speak after a while and just focus on finding comfort in each other’s arms. Nightmare feels hope and happiness overshadowed his brother’s regret, sadness, and desperate feeling. He knows that they still have a long road to repair their relationship. But knowing Dream is okay for now is more than enough. And if possible, he wants to make sure that his little twin will be okay for as long as possible.

Nightmare doesn’t know how long they have been crying but after a while, Dream’s cry finally died down, leaving only small sobs.

“Dream?” his voice came out as hoarse so he cleared out his throat.

“Y-yes?” the little guardian responded.

“Thank you,”

“…t-thank you…f-for what?”

“Thank you for giving me a second chance,”

“…”

“Dream?”

“I… care about you too a lot… brother,”

Nightmare couldn’t hold back a gentle smile as he spoke with the softest tone he has ever used.

“I know Dreamy. Are you okay now?”

“Mhm. Can we stay like this… for a while?”

Nightmare didn’t answer but he’s resting his chin on his twin’s head comfortably as a silent 'yes'.

“…brother?”

“Hm?”

“I… I still… don’t know how to feel,”

“Don’t rush it. You can ask me if you want to know something and I promise you, there will be no lies, not anymore,”

“There are a lot of things…”

“I have a lot of time,”

“…ok−yawn−ay,” Dream yawned.

“Are you sleepy?”

“Not really. Just… very… comfy,”

Dream couldn’t fool him with that sleepy tone. Even though he has gotten a few hours of sleep due to his mistake of taking the sleeping pill instead of his medicine, it’s still different when he actually ‘wants’ to sleep. And being in Nightmare’s warm embrace actually help a lot at making him sleepy.

Nightmare chuckled and continue to give Dream the comfort he needs and definitely deserves.

“Hey, I’ll be there when you wake up. I promise,”

Dream closed his eyes and nuzzles a little, enjoying the precious moment. The back of his mind said something along the line of 'it’s only a nice dream' or 'it’s not real' but he can’t bring himself to care at the moment for once. He feels warm, comfy, and maybe the happiest he could be after a very long time.

* * *

Nightmare sent a text to the scientist the moment Dream drifted off to sleep.

_-We’re finished. I’ll bring him home-_

Not too long after that, there’s a soft click from the door before it opened. Sci’s eyes immediately focused on Dream who has been clinging to Nightmare’s back with his tendrils wrapped around him like a cocoon. The smaller guardian is sleeping with a faint genuine smile on his face.

On the other hand, Sci’s expression is guilty, for one reason or another. Nightmare sighed.

“No need to feel guilty you know? You just wanted to help us, Dream especially, and I’m so thankful for your help. I’m sure that my brother thought the same,”

“His betrayed expression will definitely haunt me for the rest of my life,” the scientist chuckled dryly.

The guardian of negativity chuckled as well.

“Yeah. That baby face of his has that kind of effect on most people it sometimes terrified me,”

Nightmare's calm demeanor actually eased Sci a little.

“Anyways, besides you, does anyone know about this? His close friends maybe? Ink? Blue?”

Sci’s expression turned bitter. “Blue doesn’t know as far as I know, but he might know since he's sharper than he looks. And about Ink… well, let’s just say if there’s someone who’s very good at faking and reading facial expressions, it would be him. Dream can manipulate his emotions, you knew that, but faking facial expression? Ink is much better at it. Your brother said that Ink knew right away,”

Nightmare frowned. “I thought he can’t care about someone?”

“Oh, you knew he’s soulless?”

“Kinda obvious for Dream and I since we can literally feel someone’s emotions from their soul, not going to mention Error once told me that he tried to control Ink’s soul but found none,”

“Well, I asked about that to him once, did he care about Dream or something. His expression turned… bitter, then he said−”

* * *

_“Emotions are... something I would never understand no matter how, so I don’t know the exact answer myself._ _Dream and Blue are two of the people I spent my time the most with. We laughed, we cried, and we fought together a lot. I knew I shouldn't have gotten attached to anyone. I know it'll be hurt when something bad happened. I… I know I shouldn’t have changed the script, but the last time I didn’t do anything I lost someone dear to me and it hurt me more than I imagine despite having no soul. I even went as far as not taking my vials but somehow it only dulled the pain, not getting rid of it. You can call me selfish all you want because honestly? I am. I may respect those AUs, but I don’t want to feel that kind of pain for a second time,”_

* * *

“Ink is the most complicated monster I’ve ever met. Nobody knows what’s going on inside his head except himself. Sometimes he acted like a child that trapped inside an adult body, but he can be serious when he wants to be. He’s quite serious about Dream too, though, neither Ink and I could do much about his condition because we're scared if we meddle too much it’ll just make him even more depressed,”

Nightmare frowned. “How so?”

“Ink dragged Dream here by force for the second time because he had enough of Dream’s stubbornness. I got him anti-depressants, but he rarely takes it unless it was absolutely necessary. And… yeah,” Sci sighed. “I think the action that we did because we care about your brother, was kind of… backfired and made him felt even more depressed. Like, he feels like a burden to us. We don’t know how he did it, but he locked himself in the timeline where he lives for a few days before someone helps us to hack the code of that timeline to get in,”

The memory of that day makes the scientist shuddered.

“Let’s just say Dream’s condition is not the best when we found him,”

No. Nightmare didn’t even want to imagine, let alone knowing what actually happened.

“…thank you for taking care of him when I’m not around. I can’t… I can’t thank you enough Sci. I don’t… I don’t know if I could still hold him like this if you or Ink weren’t there,”

“Don’t mention it. I’ll inform Ink about this so if you need any help about your brother, you can contact one of us, or maybe both,”

“I’ll keep that in mind,”

Nightmare threw a sincere smile towards Sci. After that, he disappeared into the ground.

“Welp. Today was really something,” the scientist smiled.

* * *

After he finished tucking his brother to bed, Nightmare wandered around the kitchen. Even since the first time he confronted Dream, neither of them had the chance to eat. This empty universe didn’t have any source of negativity nor positivity. Nightmare still has plenty of energy though, from his brother himself lately. It was so strong he barely feels tired nor hungry.

The kitchen is… neat. Now that he thinks about it, the only messy room in this house is Dream’s room and the bathroom. Besides that, his house is quite tidy. Sadly, quite empty and cold too to the point he could practically feel the loneliness inside. And Dream has been living here for most of his life.

Nightmare opened the cabinet to find different kinds of coffee, a lot of cans of energy drink, and protein bars.

"I shouldn’t be surprised," he sighed as he closed the cabinet.

But to be honest, he was a bit surprised. His brother was (or maybe still?) a sweet tooth when they were a child. He enjoyed sweets and often shared them with him too even though he didn't enjoy it as much as his younger twin. Imagining him to drink coffee is just... wrong in his head.

There is just a lot of things for him to learn about his brother, doesn’t it?

Nightmare opened the fridge only to find some microwave foods that probably Dream bought from grocery store. He resisted the urge to throw those not-so-healthy foods but that would be a waste.

He’ll make sure Dream eats proper food after this. But for now, that food will do. At least it was better than protein bars. He doesn’t want to risk leaving Dream alone even for 5 minutes. Not until what happened last time. Not until the situation under **his** control.

Not that he’s sure he can control this situation though.

He took out one of the foods from the fridge, threw away the plastic wrap, put it inside the microwave, then turned on the machine. He walked out of the kitchen and decided to wait in the living room. He flopped down the sofa and sighed deeply.

 _'Okay. What now?'_ the guardian thought.

He didn’t actually know what to do. He doesn’t know how to help his brother. Everything he did so far was an impulsive act.

Yes, he used to have depression too, and yes, he dealt with it alone until his boys came to his life and unintentionally helped him with all their chaotic behavior. He knew how hard it was to deal with it alone. He’d be lying if he said he’s a stranger to something like depression. His boys also used to have it in the past and they managed to went through it together.

But when it comes to his brother, he’s just… at loss for what to do next. Especially when Sci mentioned something about Dream locking himself away from everyone when they acted too hasty and made him feel bad about himself.

_‘I can’t mess this up. Not even a little,’_

Little did he know from experience, life was never easy on him nor his brother.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ink was talking about his adoptive father Undertop!Gaster.  
> https://comyet.tumblr.com/post/141364763288/under-top-comyet-ink-doesnt-have-any  
> I was crying the first time I found this and it broke my heart. Poor babey （πーπ)  
> This is so sad. Alexa play despacito-
> 
> My mood keeps switching between fluff and angst lol. The next chapter of Turn Back Time is a mix of both and still in progress of editing. It'll be longer than usual but I hope you won't get bored ^^"
> 
> Thanks for reading! ^^


End file.
